Superposition
by LeShaed
Summary: So, thing: Rin has a tiny crush on Makoto which will never, ever work out and Rin knows it. No, really. Because Makoto and Haruka are like, destined to be together. Even if his two idiot best friends are determined to think otherwise. At least when everything crashes and burns, Rin will have been the voice of reason in this madness. Maybe. (Rin/Makoto/Haruka.) UPDATE: CH 6 & notes.
1. Chapter 1

I learned how to swim a long time ago as a kid, but it was for the sake of not drowning in the nearest body of water, not for competition or even fun. Frankly, I'm pretty hazy on the styles and theories, so there are probably mistakes. Sorry, I'm not sorry? Also: lazy editing alert.

* * *

_**Superposition**_

A _Free!_ Fanfiction by Shaed

* * *

_Superposition:_ the combination of two or more physical states, such as waves, to form a new physical state in accordance with this principle.

* * *

Rin had several things to be grateful for, and knew it. Some things to make up for, too, no matter what his friends said. Not many could nearly throw away three best friends, only to have them stand by him and help him through the lowest point of his life. He wasn't thirteen years old anymore, and he didn't plan on making the same mistakes.

Besides which – he could admit it now – he'd really missed them all. Haruka, Makoto, and Nagisa. He owed it all to Rei, really, which was why he'd started giving him pointers on butterfly stroke. At first he felt awkward, but Rei was a surprisingly determined pupil; what he lacked in natural talent, he made up with sheer effort. And Haruka had looked first surprised, then pleased, if the tiniest softening of his mouth was anything to go by. Nagisa, easily pleased as ever, seemed happy just to swim together. And Makoto—

Makoto's green eyes had widened slightly when he first offered to help Rei. Then they'd softened to a smile only Makoto could make. The gentle crinkling of the corners of his eyes, the warm sparkle that spoke of pleasure louder than any words, the slightest curve of his mouth. A patented Makoto smile he hadn't seen in a long time. And Rin hadn't been the only one who stared at Makoto when he made that look.

See, most people tended to watch Haru. Couldn't be helped: Haru stood out. In the water, no one and nothing could be more graceful than Haru. Small wonder Rin had zeroed in on Haru when they were children, when he was looking to assemble the best medley relay team ever. And admittedly, it was Makoto's proximity to Haru that made Rin initially notice Makoto. Even Nagisa hung all over Haru more than anyone else. But while everyone watched Haru, Haru...

Well, Haru watched Makoto. It was odd to realize this. While everyone was looking at Haru, focused on Haru, Haru's eyes kept straying back to Makoto, who stood quietly to one side, content to let Haru take the spotlight. That was how Makoto was. Giving, generous, and understanding. Even as children, when they didn't even know each other very well, Makoto had been the first to notice how obsessed Rin was with medley relay. Makoto had been the very first one to go along with him, and hadn't even pressed for a reason. Just that it was important to Rin was enough for Makoto. Once Makoto took up his cause, Nagisa was quick to join, and then Haru – and he doubted even Haru himself remembered this now – after Rin made his grand declaration to show him a sight he'd never seen before, Haru had turned his head minutely to glance at Makoto, who gave him an encouraging smile and a nod.

Truthfully, the reason he'd latched onto Haru wasn't simply because Haru was the best swimmer he knew. Haru represented success. Haru was strong, unaffected, _free_. No matter what Rin said or did, Haru remained unruffled and perfect, like the imperturbable surface of a beautiful lake. He could throw stones to make tiny ripples, but soon those would smooth back a glassy calm. He could tear into Haru and rage against him because Haru would be fine. He didn't have to feel guilty like he would with Makoto or Nagisa.

Now that he learned he could, in fact, hurt Haru, and have done so in the past, Rin was more careful. But he'd always had a temper, and the defensive rage built up inside him had years to accumulate. Even now, sometimes, it slipped out despite his efforts to keep it firmly lidded. Not often. But far too frequent for his liking. Rin didn't want to hurt his friends. If possible, not ever. When it inevitably happened, Rei would flinch minutely, then glare back with redoubled ferocity. Nagisa would stare, wide-eyed, then start talking brightly and quickly, determined to smooth things over. Haru never backed down because Haru never backed down from anything, but Haru's blue eyes would shutter, like he wasn't sure if Rin wouldn't throw a punch while at it, and was automatically bracing for it.

Makoto, though. Whenever Rin lashed out. Makoto's eyes would grow just a tiny bit wider, lips open and slack. Not in surprise and or hurt, but more like regret. Then his brows would draw in a little, and Makoto's expression would turn gentler, like the one he wore around little Ran and Ren. Like he badly wanted to reach out and ruffle Rin's hair, maybe pull him into a hug. Not that Makoto would – that was really a Nagisa thing, and once upon a time, a Rin thing, but never a Makoto thing. (Or a Haru thing, but that went without saying.)

That was the other thing Rin just didn't get. For all his friendliness, Makoto rarely ever touched others. He'd give Haru a hand to pull him out of the water, and Haru would let him (only Makoto; Rin was watching). But that was about it. The significance of Makoto's offered hand wasn't lost to Haru, or to Rin. Maybe even especially not to Rin, since he always watched them and knew Haru only watched Makoto back.

Sometimes – increasingly often lately – it made something clench tightly in his middle.

Rin knew he was important to Haru. Maybe even special. Haru had certainly gone out of his way for him, and more than once. But Haru turned to Makoto with such unshaken, absolute trust, Rin wondered if Makoto really understood what he meant to Haru.

Maybe that was unfair. This was Makoto, after all. Makoto was perceptive and understanding. Surely Makoto knew Haru cared for him and trusted him like no one else.

Even if the thought made him feel cold inside, like a child outside display window at Christmas, forever watching, but never invited.

* * *

Rin missed many things from his childhood. Bright-eyed dreams and optimistic outlook in life, for one. But he really didn't miss being called pretty, or – when he hadn't hit his growth spurt yet – being mistaken for a girl. Back when he first moved to Australia, most of the boys in the school were taller and more built than he was, and he'd been the butt of ribbing more than once in the locker room for his slim build. Which became worse after it became clear he was straggling behind everyone else. It was sort of _annoying_ that Haru still looked as pretty as ever and nobody gave him grief for that.

That he noticed things like that about his friends didn't bother him. Anymore. In Australia, it was another thing that used to send him over the edge. The constant snide remarks whenever he found his eyes invariably drawn to muscled backs and strong thighs, firm biceps and sculpted asses. He also knew he hadn't been the only one who found his eyes fixed more often to the men's swimming team than women's. But any affairs were brief and more troublesome than they were worth. Eventually he'd given up on relationships or even flings. That didn't mean his hormones had taken a similar vacation, however. Whenever his sister blushed at her team, he couldn't help but wholly sympathize with her. Hell, the first time they properly practiced together, he'd taken good five minutes gawking at Makoto's abs, then another ten at Makoto's incredibly beautiful back. One tended not to notice Makoto's back too much, since his preferred style was backstroke. But damn, in the time they hadn't seen each other, Makoto had sprouted up. And talk about ripped. Both Nagisa and Rei had beautiful bodies, too, but Makoto's built frame was the kind one would have found on statues once upon a time, when perfect bodies were worshipped as the works of gods. And Haru...

Rin _had_ spent enough time staring at where Haru's slender waist melted into hips, and those perfect, firmly muscled thighs, to retain any denial. He wasn't sure if _Haru_ noticed the same about himself, however. That he looked at Makoto a lot, that was. Especially lately. Which in itself wasn't unusual for Haru, but the way they lingered over Makoto's body, heavy as any caress – that _was_. The funniest part, though. Makoto stared at Haru almost as often as Haru stared at him, but never at the same time. As far as Rin could tell, neither of them had a clue the other stared back. The two of them really irritated him, sometimes.

Which brought him to here and now.

"Oy," Rin greeted as Makoto stepped out of the water, a casual hand slapping Makoto's back lightly. It was a friendly enough gesture, right? Guys did that sometimes. "Nice. Your form's improved," he commented, fingers still sliding over the muscled ridges of the shoulder blade, and lower.

"Ah, thanks, Rin." Makoto gave him one of his dazzling smiles, then shook the water out of his hair. "You've gotten amazingly fast yourself."

And Makoto wasn't noticing Rin's hand still on the small of his back. Or at least, not finding anything odd about it. "Thanks, I've been working on it. My butterfly's still better than front crawl, though. I need to improve on the stroke speed."

"Makoto."

Cool blue eyes, mesmerizing as water. Just now, they resembled a stormy sea more than a calm lake. "Yo, Haru. Want another race?" Rin asked. Just for the hell of it, he kept his hand where it was, resting over Makoto's lower back. "I'll beat you again," Rin promised, and was intrigued to note Haru's eyes darken.

"Diving block's that way." There was a slight hint of frown on Haru's face. More interestingly, Haru wasn't moving toward the diving blocks.

And Makoto, bless him, was looking at them from one to the other, utterly oblivious. "Do you want me to give you the start signal again?" Makoto offered with an indulgent smile.

"Yeah." Haru's eyes never left Rin. "Let's go, Rin."

"After you," Rin offered generously. Haru stared at him for another few heartbeats, then abruptly turned away to walk to the diving blocks. Rin let his hand drop the moment Haru turned his back, and tried not to feel too smug. His poor idiot friends were clueless. He really shouldn't tease them so much. But he hadn't expected Haru to act possessive. Maybe Haru wasn't as oblivious as he'd assumed.

Once they hit the water, Haru surprised him by doggedly keeping abreast with him. Maybe if Haru had undergone the same training regimen he would have outdistanced Rin by now. But Haru hadn't, and couldn't. Besides, for once Rin was enjoying himself. The water against his body felt more like a caress than a drag, and he could almost feel the water parting for him at his fingertips. Pulling one stroke after another was no longer the struggle it once was.

He hit the wall and broke the surface with a gasp. Next to him, Haru was also gasping for air, hand pressed on the wall. For a moment all he could hear the harsh gasps and roar of blood in his ears.

"Er, you two were so close that... Sorry, I wasn't using a stopwatch, and I couldn't tell—"

Makoto. Haru didn't look up. "Rin hit the wall just before I did," he said quietly.

Had he? Rin hadn't noticed. He'd been too focused on the revelation that being in water was once again something he enjoyed. He grinned widely, couldn't help it. And before, maybe Haru would have turned to him, maybe even congratulated him. Haru had, the first time he lost to Rin. The second time, Haru had looked stunned. This time, Haru didn't look stunned or unmoved. He was just looking at the wall. Like he was sulking, maybe.

"Good work," Makoto said, a hand extended to Haru in a gesture repeated so often, it was second nature. Haru took the hand just as automatically, letting Makoto pull him out of the water. A second later, however, Rin blinked in surprise when a hand entered his field of vision. "Both of you," Makoto said, flashing him a smile, and Rin had to blink, make sure Makoto was indeed offering him a hand like he'd done for Haru only seconds earlier.

"Thanks," he said, his throat suddenly tight. Makoto had a beautiful hand. Large, strong fingers, with slender but corded muscles. Rin took the proffered hand, and Makoto pulled him up, smooth and effortless, as if he was still the scrawny little kid and didn't weight a ton what with all the muscles he'd put on since then. The sudden weight of his body outside the water made him sway on his feet, just a little, and he felt Makoto's hand tighten around his own, keeping him steady.

"Careful now."

Makoto's hand was warm. Shockingly warm. Was it because he'd been in water just now?

"Water legs," Rin said weakly, suddenly awkward.

Makoto smiled at him and didn't let go. "Everyone gets that."

"Yeah."

Awkward. Seriously. Especially because Makoto _still_ hadn't let go of his hand. Not that Rin was objecting. In fact Makoto's strong fingers around his, palm warm against his own, sent a pleasant jolt through his belly. He could definitely stand more of the same.

The sudden sound Haru let out made him jump. An irritated glance in Haru's direction turned into a startled one: Nagisa had latched onto Haru, and Haru must have squeaked in surprise. Which was unusual. After all, Nagisa tackled Haru practically every day. Usually, Nagisa's sudden attacks didn't get so much as an eyeroll from Haru. But Haru's attention wasn't on Nagisa at all. Haru was looking at Makoto and Rin, and more importantly, their still-joined hands.

Right. He was still holding Makoto's hand. Makoto who was Haru's oldest and best friend before Rin ever came into the picture. The look Haru had on his face reminded Rin of the time his mother gave Gou his favorite stuffed toy. He'd loved Gou from the moment she was born, and it wasn't as if he'd minded sharing anything with her. But the stuffed toy had been his favorite, something he'd had since he was a baby and treasured for years. Seeing it plucked from his bedside and placed on Gou's pillow – he had never forgotten how he felt at that moment.

Rin knew he had to let go. Even if it was like a physical ache, the desire to keep the warmth of Makoto's hand, Makoto's presence, Makoto's attention. He wasn't that much of a bastard and the last thing he needed was to hurt Haru again. Just then, Haru's eyes slid over to meet his own, and Rin swallowed. Let go of Makoto's hand. Leaned back, enough to slide outside Makoto's personal space. "Yo, Rei, wanna work on the butterfly?"

Rei looked taken aback. "You mean, together?"

Rin had offered tips and advices, but they hadn't actually swam together. But hell, Rin wasn't going to let the boy remain the weak link in the chain, not when Rei's team was also his own at heart. "Yeah, together," Rin offered.

Rei considered him for a moment, then nodded. "That's fine."

Rin could feel eyes on his back as he moved away from the group. Nagisa, frankly assessing. Makoto, openly pleased. And Haru...impossible to read.

Rin turned to the water, snapped the elastic band of his goggles at the back of his head, and took a dive.


	2. Chapter 2

Enter the UST. So the PG rating of the chapter before? Pushing PG-13 now. :D

* * *

Just when Rin decided it was a fortunate thing that his friends always came in a package deal, he entered the Iwatobi swimming club's pool to find Makoto sitting alone at the edge of the pool, legs trailing in the water.

"Hey," Makoto greeted him with a flash of warm smile. "Haru's running late. He's in charge of class journal today. And it's Nagisa and Rei's turn for clean-up duty."

"Gou?" He'd expected his sister would be the most enthusiastic one about his visit. After a brief moment of hesitation, he went to join Makoto and sat a respectful distance away from him, dipping his feet in the water.

Makoto shook his head ruefully. "She's not joining us today. She's helping with a class project and can't get out of it, she said. She sends her apologies." A soft chuckle. "She says welcome, and for you to enjoy yourself today."

Rin made a noncommittal sound. He wasn't disappointed, but it was...awkward, being alone with Makoto. Makoto tilted his head, predictably taking his silence as disapproval.

"Sorry. And after you came all the way here to visit us, too."

"Not your fault," Rin said, and inwardly winced at how curt he sounded. "How-how have you been, anyway?"

Okay, he was _terrible_ at making small talk. That was always Makoto's role. To keep up small talk and keep them running, like the grease that kept all four of them moving smoothly. Curb overenthusiastic Nagisa. Include aloof Haru in the conversation. Answer questions so Rin didn't have to talk to himself. Swimming together was easy. When they were swimming together, it was like he'd never left. But out of the water, Rin couldn't help feeling the gap of years.

"Eh, nothing special. Junior high was pretty uneventful. I..." A sliver of hesitation, then Makoto continued. "I wasn't in the swimming club for second and third year. Or first year of high school. So it was pretty boring, I guess."

Rin didn't have to read between lines, not for this one. Haru had dropped out of the swimming team during junior high, after that fateful race with Rin. So Makoto had followed. And when Haru started swimming again, Makoto had again followed. Rin swallowed the lump of guilt in his throat. "No wonder you were in such pathetic shape during prelims." Okay, that wasn't antagonistic at all. Rin backtracked hastily. "Anyway, I can't believe you shot up so much. You and I were about the same height back in grade school."

Makoto laughed easily, not taking offense. "Hit my growth spurt early, I guess. How was—" Makoto stopped, and Rin watched him, puzzled, as Makoto very obviously swallowed the rest of his question. "How's Samezuka?"

_How was Australia?_That was what Makoto meant to ask. And didn't, because Makoto was too considerate and even without knowing everything that happened, Makoto instinctively avoided the topic. "We have a strong team," Rin answered, because that was the truth. Haru probably wouldn't ask and even if Nagisa was only a year younger than they were, all of them had an unspoken rule against telling depressing stories to Nagisa. Hell, who knew how long he'd have to wait until next time he and Makoto were alone? And this was Makoto. It wasn't like Makoto of all people would judge him.

"And Australia was kind of terrible. Disgusting summers. Well, winter here. I couldn't get away fast enough for winter breaks."

"Oh." Makoto was clearly startled, but smiled encouragingly. "I heard it gets really hot."

"Yeah, and you burn up like a crisp if you're not careful. The sun's no joke there. Made outdoor swimming kinda painful if you weren't careful."

Makoto laughed softly. "I can imagine. Even here, really. We learned our lesson the hard way when we went for our training camp this summer. I started peeling the day after I got back. Even Haru. I think only Rei had the foresight to wear sunscreen the whole time."

And – Rin realized with a start – Makoto would never press harder. Would never ask first. Not unless Rin chose to tell him.

"Good athletic program there, though." It was in the past. He could talk about this. Really, he could. "I had trouble keeping up."

Makoto didn't answer right away. In fact Makoto looked like he was at a loss what to say. "Was it hard? The training."

"Yeah." Rin kicked the water lightly, not enough to kick up a spray, but enough to make it swish around his legs. "I was scrawny compared to everyone else. And - well. They were just better swimmers. I couldn't compare."

"Oh, but I'm sure—"

"It's okay, Makoto. I don't need you to coddle me." Rin didn't mean to cut him off, but he really didn't want to hear empty platitude. Or worse, words of consolation. "Besides, I got better. I'm going to get even better."

"I know that." Makoto's tone left no room to doubt his sincerity. "I know you will, Rin." His expression gentled. "Haru never doubted it, either."

"Haru told you that?" Because Rin rather doubted it. It wasn't like Haru to talk about things like that.

"No, but he doesn't have to."

Rin snorted. "No, he never has to tell you anything except—" What Makoto meant to Haru. Right. He couldn't talk about that, either. And if he was honest with himself, Rin would rather swallow his tongue than talk about it, anyway. Speaking of tongues, Rin thought wryly. Makoto would never be convinced his interest was very much returned short of Haru putting his tongue down Makoto's throat. And wouldn't it be a sight? Except, of course, Haru would never do that. Rin was kind of glad, except it made Makoto sad. Sometimes, when Nagisa was hanging all over Haru as usual, and Rei was speaking to Haru earnestly, or when Haru and Rin raced, Makoto got that look on his face. Sort of a wistful look. Like there was something Makoto really, really wanted, but knew better than to ask for, because he was convinced the answer would be no.

"Haru's serious about his feelings, you know. He's always been shy about expressing them, but that doesn't make them any less serious."

There was a hint of pain under the words that struck Rin. "What are you talking about?" Rin asked blankly.

"Well..." Makoto hesitated, a faint blush spreading over his neck. "You know that you've always been...special, to Haru. He's always wanted to swim with you, and—"

_What?_ Rin shook his head helplessly. What was Makoto talking about? "Wait, what are you—"

"—And I know he doesn't say it in words, but he really does care about you—"

"Wait." Rin rubbed his forehead, feeling like he would get a headache if they continued. Makoto thought... How on earth had they even gotten into this tangled mess? "You think Haru likes _me?_"

Makoto let out a tiny sigh. "I'm just saying, even if he doesn't say anything, it's always been clear to people who know Haru well."

"It's not me he wants, stupid, it's—" _You_. The word stuck in his throat. He couldn't. Maybe, once assured of Haru's feelings, Makoto wouldn't need Haru's tongue down his throat to make the next move. Then they could exchange their vows or whatever and be together forever. Rin had no illusions; he had no place there, not between Haru and Makoto's tightly woven relationship.

The right thing, the _honorable_ thing to do, would be to just leave it. Let the two idiots figure it out.

Damn it, Rin never wanted to hurt his friends, but this wasn't _fair_. While Makoto and Haru went nowhere with their relationship just waiting to happen, he was stuck, unable to say anything. And once the two did figure it out, then he would never have another chance.

Makoto wasn't expecting him to lunge forward, but this was Makoto: Makoto didn't even flinch, looking back at him with a puzzled expression. Rin kept his hand gentle, caressing the hair at the nape of Makoto's neck. Makoto probably wouldn't punch him. Or even if he did, it'd be worth it. So Rin leaned closer and pressed his lips against Makoto's.

Makoto's mouth was slack against his. Even when Rin licked at his lip, tongue briefly darting inside to steal a taste, Makoto remained still and unresponsive. Probably too shocked to do anything. A detached part of Rin's mind wondered if this was the first time anyone ever kissed Makoto. At least this was his to keep.

"Anyway, leaving Haru aside, it's you I like," Rin murmured against Makoto's unresisting mouth. There was still no response from Makoto, and Rin pulled away. He'd expected as much. It had always been Haru for Makoto. Confirming it shouldn't hurt this much. "Sorry," he said quietly. "Tell the guys I said sorry. I'm come visit again another day."

Before Makoto could reply, he got up and left, leaving Makoto looking like his world had just turned upside down.

* * *

"Matsuoka, you have a visitor."

It had been a week since he visited Iwatobi. Since then, he hadn't heard from anyone except Nagisa, who texted him complaining he didn't wait for them. Rin sighed, wondering if it was Gou again.

"Haru."

His visitor turned to pin him with a bright blue stare. "Rin."

Judging from the serious expression, whatever Haru was here for, the conversation wasn't the kind he could have in the lobby. "Come on. Ai's out right now. We can talk in my room."

Haru didn't say another word, falling in step next to him. After the door closed behind them, Rin sighed. "Make yourself comfortable. Want anything to drink?"

"No."

Haru laid a hand on the back of Rin's chair, but didn't sit. Rin sat down on his bed and raised an eyebrow. "So? What brings you here?" Actually, he had a guess. But what the hell, he wasn't going to make this any easier for Haru. Rin owed him, but he didn't owe Haru this.

"A week ago, when you came over," Haru started, then paused. "You saw Makoto."

There was no reason to deny that. "Yes."

"What did you say to him?"

Not what did they talk about, but what _he_ said to Makoto. Rin guessed Makoto must not have told Haru what happened, then. "Not much." Just that he liked Makoto. "Why?"

"You upset him."

Probably true. "Ah."

"He won't talk to me." Haru's words fell softly, but Rin knew him enough to pick out the hesitation threading through them. "What did you say to him?"

"Why are you asking?" Rin asked bluntly.

"Because Makoto's upset," Haru repeated, and if this was anyone else, Rin would have banged his head against the wall in frustration.

"It was private. Which would be why Makoto chose not to tell you." That part was a guess. But if Haru came all the way to see him for answers, then Makoto likely hadn't said anything at all.

Haru frowned. "Rin, if you've hurt him—"

"Oh, for fuck's sake." Rin dragged a hand through his hair, pulling out strands in his agitation. "I told Makoto I like him. I'm not asking him for an answer back. Or pressuring him in any way."

"I didn't realize," Haru said finally. "That you felt that way."

Haru's words were quiet, but simmering underneath was _hurt_. And Rin didn't understand just what on earth Haru could possibly be hurt about when Makoto clearly liked Haru. Haru only had to say the words to have Makoto. Makoto wasn't oblivious about his own feelings for Haru – only about Haru's feelings for him. "It's not my business if you're too scared to tell him how you feel. But don't expect anyone else to hold back if you're not going to make your move."

The blank look of shock surprised him, and Rin stopped short. Could Haru really be that oblivious? For crying out loud, he'd come all the way to Samezuka to confront Rin for upsetting Makoto. Where was Haru's unperturbed composure now, his unflappable, infuriating calm? It never occurred to Haru it wasn't normal for him to react like this?

But this was about _Makoto_. And Haru. Damn it, if it had been anyone else Rin wouldn't have bothered.

"Nobody's standing in your way but you, Nanase Haruka," Rin said, and the strange equanimity of his own words startled him. He sounded serene, like somebody who'd already come to terms with his defeat.

"I—" Haru dropped his eyes, his blue eyes like swirling water, its calm disarrayed in confusion. "I don't understand."

"I don't think you do, no." It was more of a realization, really. Rin groaned, and let himself fall back on the bed. "Did you never notice? Haru, you came all the way here to talk to me when you thought I might have hurt Makoto. You watch him all the time. What did you think it all meant?"

"But...you said you like him."

Rin snorted, not bothering to sit up. "It happens sometimes. Pretty often, actually. You like someone, he doesn't like you back."

"You think Makoto doesn't like you back." Haru's voice was curiously calm again. "Did he tell you that?"

Well, no. Rin hadn't given Makoto a chance to reject him since he knew Makoto's answer before he ever said anything. "No. But he doesn't have to." He let out a sigh and covered his face with both hands. "You can tell him he can stop worrying about it. I knew before I told him," he mumbled through his hands.

The bed dipped, and Rin pulled his hands away from his face. Haru was sitting on his bed, watching him. The blue eyes were settled again. "You told him because you wanted him to know," Haru said, but the words were a question. Rin nodded mutely. "Before, Makoto said that he – wanted to swim with me. That it was..." Haru paused. Was it just a trick of the light, or was a faint blush dusting Haru's face? "...He said it was meaningless without me."

Rin's first thought wasn't a kind one. Just because he accepted Makoto liked Haru, it didn't mean he wanted a play-by-play on the actual confession. Possibly Haru was even more clueless than Rin gave him credit for if he didn't realize how Makoto felt even after that. The second thought was something of exasperation. Of course Haru would take all this in the context of swimming.

"Is that what he meant? That he—"

"—Likes you?" Rin finished for him. "Why don't you ask him?"

"I feel the same," Haru continued, as if he didn't notice Rin's interruption. "But I also wanted to swim with you."

Rin gaped at him speechlessly for a full minute. "Okay, you really need to stop with the swimming analogies," was the first thing out of his mouth.

"When you said you won't swim with me again," Haru began, then stopped. In the ensuing silence, Rin frowned, trying to figure out what the hell Haru was talking about. Was he referring to the prefectural, maybe? When Rin won in the 100 meter freestyle? "Nothing mattered anymore. I didn't want that." Haru was frowning now. "But you said you wanted to swim with me again. With us. In the relay."

Haru sounded both stubborn and uncertain, and Rin gave in to the urge and groaned. "Haru. Seriously. Stop that. When I said I want to swim with all of you guys, that did _not_ equal a love confession for all three of you. Hell, is that what you think Nagisa means when he says that to you?"

Haru took a distressingly long time to answer that. "No."

Rin sighed. "There you have it then. When I said I want to swim with you three, I meant I want to swim with you three. When Makoto said he wants to swim with you, that it's meaningless without you, maybe he meant something more. But that's something you're going to have to ask Makoto, not me."

Haru pulled up his knees and folded his arms over his folded knees. His face was expressionless, but it was a thoughtful kind of expressionlessness, not the unfeeling kind. Rin did not bother getting up. He really had no energy for this kind of things, especially after Samezuka swimming club's brutal practice session. "But that's what I thought," Haru finally said. "That it's meaningless without you."

"Ha?" There was Haru-logic for you. But then again, in Haruka-speak, wanting to swim together equated true love. "What about Makoto, then?"

Haru considered that carefully. "I couldn't have done any of this without Makoto." Then, more softly he added, "It's no good, without Makoto."

Rin shook his head, putting an arm over his eyes. Yes, apparently it _was_ possible for someone to be this clueless. "I feel so bad for Makoto," he muttered. Maybe Makoto didn't say anything not because he feared Haru didn't return his feelings, but because he thought Haru just wouldn't get it.

Haru reached for his wrist, pulling his arm away from his eyes, and Rin didn't have time to react save for a short questioning sound when Haru kissed him.

Haru's kiss was clumsy, so unlike his preternatural grace in the water. Just a press of mouth against his own. Cooler than Makoto's, but soft. But not hesitant. Rin wasn't sure what made him open his mouth, to flick his tongue against Haru's. His hand had slid into Haru's hair without him knowing, and he'd tilted his face just so that they fit better together—

What they were doing dawned on him then, and Rin pulled away. Tried to, anyway. Haru tried to follow him and caught the corner of Rin's mouth instead. When Rin tried to voice his protest, Haru kissed him again, this time properly. And damn, the kid was a fast learner. Haru's hand was fisting his sheet, and their angle was awkward, but Haru's tongue shared the same grace the rest of his body possessed in the water, darting and sliding in his mouth with confidence that surprised Rin. Or maybe it was just bullheaded determination.

When Haru finally pulled back, he was breathing quickly, lips wet and a little bit swollen. Anyone who took one look at Haru now would know he'd been kissing. Mesmerizing blue eyes, soft and dark, shimmered above him. "Oh," Haru breathed, and Rin could see the flush rising over his cheeks.

"You suck at that." Rin's mouth had gained a will of its own. But he couldn't help a smirk at the face Haru pulled. "Don't tell me that was the first time you ever kissed someone."

Now Haru just looked irritated. "Shut up," he muttered, but the faint blush had deepened.

"Make me," Rin challenged, and everything felt perfectly normal between them, the mutual challenge as natural as breathing, as swimming. And for one moment, he thought everything might be okay—

Haru kissed him again. And did he mention Haru was always a quick study? Because Haru was sucking on his tongue like he'd been French-kissing all his life. His brain short-circuited for a moment and Rin cursed himself for the lapse, because during that time Haru managed to straddle him, making the angle so much easier on both of them and _oh yeah_. His mostly chaste kiss with Makoto aside, he hadn't dated anyone in the longest time, and Nanase-fucking-Haruka had just _grinded against him_. That was it. He'd officially entered Twilight Zone and missed the sign a mile back.

Haru was the one who broke the kiss with a gasp, panting, looking down at him with something akin to shock. Rin was too busy restoring the blood back in his brain to even make a smart-mouthed comment this time. "What," he managed after a few tries, "the hell was that for?"_What about Makoto?_ his mind whined, now that his brain was getting oxygen again.

Haru shook his head. "I...wanted to."

"Hell, you want _something_, all right." Rin sighed. "But tell you what. Don't go 'round kissing anyone until you figure out what the hell you want. Or rather, who."

Haru frowned at him. "You kissed me back."

Rin glared at him. He liked boys, damn it, and he'd have to be dead to not respond to Nanase Haruka sitting in his lap slipping him the tongue. "You kissed me first," Rin countered because he was five.

"You put your tongue in my mouth—"

"Oh my God, Haruka. Shut up," Rin entreated fervently. "And get off me," he added for a good measure. After scowling at him, Haru did get off him, sitting cross-legged on the bed while Rin sat up. "Look. In case you missed this the first time, I like boys. And I like Makoto. The one Makoto likes isn't me. And you don't know what you're feeling, let alone who you're feeling it for, so why don't we both call it a night? You can let me know how everything goes after you sort yourself out."

Haru just watched him for a long moment, then with a tiny shrug, slipped off his bed. His hand on the doorknob, Haru paused to look back at him. "Rin."

"What?" Rin couldn't quite keep the irritation out of his voice. He was trying to decide whether it'd help more to go swim in the pool, take a cold shower, or just jerk off in the shower. But every option necessitated that Haru leave his room. The sooner, the better.

"I enjoyed it. Kissing you."

Rin groaned. "Get lost, Nanase."

Rin wasn't sure, but he thought Haru's mouth twitched in amusement. "Good night, Rin."

The door closed.

* * *

I'm posting relationship troubles (?) on a Valentine's Day because I am morbid like that. :D

Happy Valentine's Day!

_-February 14, 2014_


	3. Chapter 3

Because this was totally not clear before: Rin does have a bit of potty mouth when angry. (Why am I even putting a language warning on when the overall RATING is already M...)

FYI, I probably won't be able to do the next update until end of this week, possibly weekend. :(

* * *

Two days after Haru's visit, Rin received a text message from Makoto asking to see him. The message was innocuous enough. If Rin hadn't kissed Makoto the last time they saw each other, or Haru since then, he could have pretended nothing was wrong.

Ah well. At least Makoto would be polite about turning him down. Probably would give him the let-us-be-friends speech, too. That was how Makoto was. Rin chose shirt and jeans he felt were sufficiently dark to express his black humor, and went out to meet Makoto.

Makoto had called him out to the old shore-side walkway with nice benches. Well, the nice benches were new. It seemed the walk had been extensively renovated since he lived there as a kid. When he arrived, Makoto was waiting for him on one of the benches, hands tight on his knees, looking nervous and determined at once. Resigned, Rin walked over to join him.

"Yo."

"Rin. Hi." Makoto rose to greet him. "Sorry to call you out so late," he stammered. "I—wanted to talk to you."

"Clearly." Rin didn't wait for an invitation to sit down. Makoto automatically followed the suit. For the next couple minutes there was a silence, with Makoto looking like he didn't know where to start. "So what did you want to talk about?" Rin prompted when another minute went by without a word.

"About— About what you said last time." Right, then. Rin held back a sigh. "I thought about it. And—"

"You like Haru," Rin interrupted. He just...didn't want to hear Makoto say the words. Knowing and hearing Makoto say them were two different things.

"Y-yeah. How..." Makoto reddened. "Was I that obvious?"

Rin sighed. "Pretty much. Except to Haru, maybe."

A rueful chuckle answered him. "Yeah, probably. When Nagisa dared him to talk about a romantic experience, Haru talked about finding a really nice waterfall."

Sadly, Rin had no trouble believing that. "Well, he does tend to not notice anyone except when they're in the water." An idea occurred to him then. "Was that why you started swimming?"

"No," Makoto answered immediately. "Well, maybe a little bit, but not like that. We both liked swimming since we were little and I was afraid if I stopped we wouldn't have anything in common anymore. I didn't want to stop, anyway. I still like swimming. That wasn't about Haru."

"But it'd be meaningless without him."

Makoto looked taken aback. It took Rin a moment to remember where he'd heard that from, and when he did, he could have kicked himself. "Where did you – did Haru tell you?"

"Er." Rin swallowed. "Yeah." More glumly he added, "For what it's worth, I don't think he got it even with that."

"Rin," Makoto said with unbearable gentleness. "That's how Haru feels about you. That it'd be meaningless without you."

"They're not the same thing!" Rin exclaimed. "I mean, you _like him_. Haru just likes swimming."

"Rin." Makoto had a look on his face that made it impossible to look away, or refute him in any way. "And to Haru, swimming is the most natural state to be. He said swimming is meaningless without you there. Don't you understand the significance of that?"

"He's confused. Also possibly a hydrophiliac." Makoto looked puzzled at the last, and Rin belatedly recalled he'd used the English word for that. "You know. Water-crazed maniac."

"Well," Makoto said with obvious hints of amusement. "He does try to strip every time he sees a body of water. We nearly got kicked out of the shopping mall the other time because Haru started taking his clothes off at the fountain."

"And here I thought Nagisa was the one who liked to go skinny-dipping."

"To be fair, Nagisa _is_ the only one who does that. Haru always has his swimsuit on underneath."

"Yeah, well, my point is: his unnatural relationship with water aside, Haru's totally confused about what he wants."

Makoto actually had the gall to sigh at him in a long-suffering way. "Rin. While I appreciate your effort to make me feel better, don't you think maybe you shouldn't assume so much about Haru? He's not a child. He knows what he wants."

"Does he?" Rin shot back, the challenge almost a spinal reflex for him now. "So when he stares at you like you're carrying the pool around in your boxer shorts, what's that supposed to mean? Do you think Haru knows?"

"That's—" Makoto paused. "Does he?"

It was Rin's turn to sigh. "Oh for..." He let out a frustrated breath. "Look. You stare at Haru when he's not looking. Haru stares at you just as often but still doesn't know what that means. So don't tell me Haru know what he wants. If he did he'd have his mouth around your dick already, because that would be the only way he could convince you."

"Rin!" Makoto hissed, face on fire. He automatically looked around to see if anyone had overheard, then gave him a deeply reproachful look. Rin returned the look evenly, refusing to back down. Besides which, he was _right_, he wasn't going to take it back. Once satisfied they didn't have any listeners, Makoto let out a little sigh and ran a hand through his hair. "Okay. So, to recap. I like Haru. Haru likes you. Wait till I finish," Makoto interrupted before Rin could disagree. "And you...like me," Makoto continued, his voice gone uncertain and soft over the words. "So where does that leave us?"

"Fucked?" Rin offered. Although Makoto gave him another reproachful look, he didn't contradict him. "Look, I never said any of this crap works out like we want. But I'm positive the one Haru likes is you. And that way at least two out of the three of us will get what we want."

"What about you?"

Rin shrugged. "Sometimes someone has to lose out." And he was done being bitter about it. Really. When it came to Makoto and Haru, he found it hard hold anything against them anyway.

Makoto looked unexpectedly stubborn. "I don't believe that."

"Makoto—"

"You're special to Haru. That much is obvious. I think Haru is also special to you." Makoto continued briskly. "Whatever else we all feel, I don't think Haru's the only one who doesn't fully understand what he wants. I think we need to talk it over. Together." Bright green eyes speared him. "All three of us."

"You've got to be kidding me." Unfortunately, Rin knew Makoto. If Makoto was set on this, very little could dissuade him. And Haru, what with his awakening hormones, would make a fearsome addition to what already promised to be the most awkward conversation of the century. Great. And here Rin was hoping for some sort of resolution that _didn't_ end with Haru and Makoto never speaking to him again. "Okay, so when this all goes to hell in a reed basket, just remember: I was the voice of reason here."

"That," Makoto said with a glint in his eyes that deeply, deeply worried Rin, "remains to be seen."

* * *

Unfortunately for Rin, Makoto wasn't just determined, but pretty fast on his feet. Which was why he found himself dragged over to Haru's house first thing Sunday morning. And by dragged he meant it literally; Makoto had a firm grip on his elbow and was towing him up the steps. Before Rin could compose himself Makoto was ringing the doorbell, and bam! It was right back to that nightmare he had, about meeting Haru and running into his dad and seeing the funeral procession all over again. Haru didn't answer the door – which, if Rin hadn't been feeling so disoriented, he could have used to escape. By the time Rin had collected himself, Makoto was already dragging him to the back door and letting them in with nary a care in the world. Like he did this all the time. Come to think of it, Makoto probably did.

"Look, maybe he's not home. We can do this another day—"

"Nope. Haru's always home around this time on Sundays."

Rin frowned. That sounded like... "Wait a minute. Did you even tell him we're coming?"

"Nope."

Rin stared at him incredulously. "Okay. Who are you and what have you done with Tachibana Makoto?" Because more and more, this sounded like a stunt Nagisa might pull, not the ever-polite, dependable Makoto. Maybe this Makoto was really Nagisa in disguise. Or Makoto's evil clone. He should have known better than to trust it when Makoto suddenly suggested a three-way conversation about who likes whom in their screwy threesome. And he didn't even mean that in a dirty way.

But the look Makoto shot him, at once patient and disapproving, was patently Makoto. "Come on. Haru's probably in the bath."

Rin barely managed a sound of protest when Makoto grabbed him by the arm again and marched toward the bathroom, which was a bad idea for so many reasons—

Before Rin could finish his thought the door slid open. To a breathy moan.

Makoto froze at the doorstep, but didn't let go of him, so Rin had no choice but to stand there and look at Haru's flushed face. Damn, he _had_said this could only go to hell in a reed basket. Haru stared back at them, wide-eyed and equally speechless.

"Makoto," Haru finally managed, still sounding breathless. "Rin."

Makoto didn't answer. There was a pair of jammers draped over the rim of the bathtub. The flush on Haru's face, Rin was quite sure, wasn't from embarrassment.

Rin cleared his throat twice before he found his voice. "Are we interrupting?"

Haru considered the question, eyes going from Makoto to Rin. "No," Haru decided.

Rin dragged a hand through his hair with a short sigh. "Let me rephrase that: am I interrupting?"

Haru gave him a defiant – or possibly just annoyed – look. "No," he repeated, a touch of impatience in his voice.

Rin made a sound of disgust and gave Makoto a shove forward. "You deal with this. He was your idiot friend before he was mine. I'll wait outside."

The evil clone theory regained life when Makoto stepped forward _without releasing his arm_, and Rin closed his eyes before realizing that was pointless. Because Makoto was offering Haru a hand, like he was just helping Haru up from the swimming pool. And Haru reached for Makoto's hand like he'd been hanging out in bathtub in his swimsuit and not jerking off a second ago. Hell, when did his friends get so weird?

Teeth gritted, Rin snagged a towel and threw it in Haru's face. "Here."

Haru toweled himself off and meandered away, hopefully to find some clothes, because Haru hadn't bothered to drape the towel around his hip like any decent person would have. And Haru's ass looked even better without the jammers. Rin groaned and resigned himself to a one-way trip to hell on the same reed basket ride since Makoto and Haru clearly didn't intend to offer him a way out.

By the time Haru rejoined them (fully clothed, thank heaven for small favors), Makoto was preparing tea, navigating through Haru's kitchen with a familiarity that made Rin quite uncomfortable. Haru didn't even comment, just came in and took out three mugs and put them on the table. Without missing a beat, Makoto grabbed the teapot and poured the tea, and handed Rin and Haru each a mug. Haru took the seat next to Rin, opposite from Makoto, and the whole scene was frighteningly domestic. The two of them were acting so _married_.

"We need to talk," Makoto started without preamble. Haru just nodded, wrapping both hands around his mug, and Rin tried very hard not to fidget in his seat. "Okay, to start off – Haru, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about what happened when Rin visited. I needed some time to sort out my thoughts."

"I went to see Rin about that," Haru answered softly. "A few days ago."

Makoto took a deep breath. "Well, the thing is, Rin told me that he likes me." No fanfare, no shock, not even recrimination. This was all becoming distressingly anticlimactic. "And I know you like him, Haru. So I was – at a bit of a loss."

Rin scowled in Haru's direction. "_You_ like Makoto," he challenged.

Haru didn't so much as shrug. "Yeah." Haru then turned to Makoto with a perfectly deadpan expression which was completely incongruous with the fact _he'd just confessed his non-platonic feelings for his best friend_. Was Rin the only person still awake in this bizarre dream? "I kissed Rin when I visited him," Haru announced, like he was telling Makoto he'd had mackerel for dinner last night.

"Rin's always been special to Haru," Makoto said, and it wasn't clear whom he was addressing this time. "And – unless I'm very mistaken, Haru's always been special to Rin."

The denial was on the tip of Rin's tongue. Why couldn't he just get it out? It would solve all his problems in one fell swoop.

Yes, and leave him alone and cold for the rest of his life. But besides that tiny technical detail it was a sound plan.

"What about you?" Rin hadn't meant to sound so defensive, but it was hard not to when he felt cornered. "You like Haru, don't you?"

To his credit, Makoto didn't try to equivocate. "Yes," he answered softly, but with seriousness that left no doubt he meant it. "So I guess that leaves just one problem."

Rin blinked. Haru had just reached out to grab Makoto by the collar. In one economical move Haru pulled him closer and pressed their lips together. With significantly more skill than when he'd kissed Rin. And a lot more tongue. Fuck his life, what did Haru think Rin was, a practice run? Just when he was about to voice his displeasure in no uncertain terms, Haru pulled back and sat down like nothing happened. "Now we're even," Haru stated like that should make sense.

Makoto was blinking rapidly, like someone trying to reboot his brain. "That's not exactly what I meant, but – getting there, I guess."

"Wait a minute." Rin's brain had checked in at long last. "So – I kissed Makoto, and Haru kissed me, so – now that you two kissed it makes us all even?" Rin glared at both of them. "What the _hell_. We're talking about relationships, not some fucked up algebra!"

"I thought you liked it when I kissed you," Haru pointed out, and that was just about all Rin could take.

"Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty," Rin snapped viciously. "It's called hormones. And in case you haven't noticed, I'm pretty damned hot. Killer bod, too. So if you think whacking off to my six packs and sweet ass means something, I've got news for you, Haru. You don't particularly need to feel anything permanent for someone you want to fuck."

"Rin!" Makoto's voice was full of disapproval, and Rin twitched before he could help himself. Makoto cleared his throat with the blush still high on his cheeks, and God help him, Rin still couldn't help but feel hopelessly attracted. "Right. So. I guess the remaining issue was how I feel about Rin, and what we're going to do next."

"Leave me out of this," Rin countered automatically. "While we're talking algebra – guess what? You can't just add people up like that and expect it to work. It's feelings, not popsicles. You don't get two plus two in feelings."

"Makoto splits his popsicle with me all the time," Haru said, and Rin let his head fall to the table with a bang.

"I fucking give up," Rin mumbled into the wooden surface. Haru was throwing him on a loop so wild, he didn't have the energy to follow, let alone stay angry.

"If Makoto wants, I can share."

"Fan-fucking-tastic," Rin muttered to the table, in English, but figured the emotion behind it would carry over fine. "I'm trapped in here with crazy people. Send help."

"Rin." Makoto – it had to be Makoto patting his back so gently – soothed. "I'm not entirely sure if something can be worked out, either. And I was fine with not taking anything further. But you sort of – started the ball rolling here when you kissed me, and—"

"Wait wait wait." Rin shot up to glare at Makoto. "Are you saying all this is _my fault?_"

"You did kiss me back," Haru pointed out.

Rin transferred his glare in Haru's direction. "After _you_ kissed me first!"

Haru blinked at him, considered, then spoke again. "Because you came and kissed Makoto first, and Makoto wouldn't tell me what happened."

"That's it. I'm just going to leave, pretend all this was a bad dream." Rin stood. Or tried to: Haru latched onto his wrist and Makoto grabbed his other elbow.

"And then what?" Makoto asked quietly. "You'll never speak to us again?"

"No." Well, maybe a little. "Not permanently. And besides which – look, it's obvious you two have the hots for each other. You are perfect for each other and all that, so just get together, forget this conversation ever happened, and when we're less awkward we can give the whole friendship thing another shot."

"Sit down, Rin," Makoto said, and it wasn't a request. Startled, Rin sat down automatically. "I need you to listen to me without interrupting. It'll be only a moment." Makoto's tone brooked no argument, and Rin just stared at him mutely. "When you left us that first time to go to Australia, that was one thing. Even when I found out you'd been back and met Haru, and neither of you ever mentioned it to me or Nagisa, I let it be, because I figured you both had your reasons and I didn't want to dig into anyone's painful memories. After you came back, Haru wanted to compete again, and I was happy. Because Haru is most himself when he swims, and you brought that back to him. So you can imagine I was a little bit," Makoto enunciated his words carefully, "_upset_, when Haru was wandering around looking so lost after you told him you weren't going to swim with him anymore. And then we were in the relay together and everything was okay, until you nearly left us. Again."

"What – I was _taken off the relay team_—"

"Quiet. That nearly left Haru in pieces _again_ and if it hadn't been for Rei, I don't know if I could have handled that. So understand me, Rin, when I say I'm through letting you two handle things yourselves. If whatever is going on between you two affects both of you so much, can hurt you this deeply, it becomes my business. I can count on one hand the number of people I care about in this world as much as I care about you and Haru. Whether as a friend or something more, in whatever capacity, I _am_ going to be a part of this."

"In other words he's not letting you walk away from this," Haru supplied helpfully, and Rin could have smacked that tiny hint of smirk right off Haru's pretty face.

"Just because _you_ never learned to prioritize. You were always the selfish one." Rin groused, but strangely enough, didn't feel as annoyed as he thought he'd be. "You can't have your cake and eat it too. You don't always get to have everything you want."

Makoto smiled, even if it was a little tight around the edges. "Well, Haru's an only child, unlike us."

"I can't, without Makoto. And I need you. To swim."

Makoto just gave him a look that, if he wasn't Makoto, would have said, "I told you so."

Rin closed his eyes with a sigh. There was something stubbornly innocent in Haru he couldn't help find endearing. He'd blamed Haru – the whole relay business, really – for his failures over the years. But in truth, his relay team had been the very thing that allowed him to go on when he thought he couldn't. He owed Haru and Makoto after all they'd done for him, especially when _he_ had unwittingly taken Haru from the water once before. Trust Makoto to figure out how to guilt-trip him successfully. Even if Rin didn't accept the argument wholesale, he couldn't deny Makoto was right about one thing: there was no way to back out.

"I was still the voice of reason in all this," Rin muttered, resigned to going along with them. For the time being. After all, how long could this insanity possibly last? "So exactly what do you plan to do next?"

Makoto's eyes, predictably, was drawn to Haru. "Well, I was willing to wait it out. But I get the feeling neither you nor Haru can."

What? Just because he hadn't gotten laid in a good long while, it didn't mean he would cave just because of pent up frustration. Sure, he'd caved pretty quickly when Haru sat on him and slipped him some tongue, but that was... Rin swallowed at the look Haru fixed him with, and hastily looked back at Makoto. "If he can, I can," he insisted stubbornly, and the corners of Makoto's mouth lifted for a proper smile this time.

"Rin, you specifically said this is a relationship, so—"

Oh, he had _not!_

"—That means we can take this slow. Start with regular dating and see where we go."

Which...wait a minute. "Did you date before, Makoto?" Rin demanded, the thought of Makoto with somebody else like a sudden hot flash in the back of his skull.

Makoto darted a guilt-ridden look at Haru, by which Rin assumed Haru hadn't been informed. "Um...a little bit." Haru's frown had gained a scary edge. "It wasn't serious! It was just for a couple months, and—" That wasn't a storm in Haru's blue eyes anymore, it was a veritable typhoon. And for once Rin found himself in a wholehearted agreement with Haru. "We broke up. It was ages ago. Really, I can tell you about it later."

"No."

If words could cut, Haru's icy refusal would have. Rin raised an eyebrow and looked to Makoto in a mute question. "Er. Or not. Anyway I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Haru."

"Did you break up because of Haru?" Rin asked, because he might have lost the war, but that didn't mean he had to be graceful about it. Besides which, it was just too much fun to tease Makoto.

Makoto stayed quiet for a suspiciously long time. "I just...didn't feel right about it," Makoto said finally, and Rin held back a sigh, seeing the evasion for what it was. No doubt Haru hadn't missed it, either. But far from feeling guilty, Haru looked pleased.

"Good God. You haven't dated in ever, have you?" The question was addressed to Haru, who turned to regard Rin with a cold look. "And you're planning to jump into a three-way relationship? I don't know if you're brave or stupid. Actually scratch that. You're just insane."

Haru narrowed his eyes. "How many?"

"Ha?"

"How many people did you date?" Haru repeated, eyes resembling slivers of ice now.

Rin sputtered. "That's none of your damn business!"

"In Australia or here?" Haru leaned forward, peering closely at Rin. "Are you dating that kid? The one that follows you around everywhere?"

"Who?" Rin asked blankly. "Oh, Ai."

"'Ai'?" Makoto questioned, mildly enough, but – was that a glint in his eyes?

"Aichirou's my roommate. Damn it, Haru, that's not – we're not dating. And even if I was, that's none of your business."

Makoto gave a discreet cough. "Actually, it's our business now." He turned a bright smile on Rin, and damn it all, this was why Rin didn't want to talk to Makoto: it was impossible to refuse Makoto when he turned on the puppy eyes and the killer smile. "Right?"

After full thirty seconds on the receiving end of the patented Makoto smile, Rin gritted his teeth and conceded. "Fine. Whatever."

"Okay, now that we're all on the same page. D'you guys want to go out today? Together?"

Rin gave Makoto an incredulous look. "Oh my God, you are an evil schemer and I hate you. You planned this."

Makoto gave him an innocent look that Rin was beginning to trust less and less. "Well, it's a Sunday. I figured we could hang out afterward if everything went okay."

"At home?"

Rin gaped at Haru, who looked back at him with a hint of challenge in his gaze. Right. They'd caught Haru jerking off in the bath not an hour ago. And Rin was totally not thinking about the fact Haru lived alone in a nice, big house, and there was just the three of them. There was a spark of heat in the way Haru looked at him, and the memory of the last time he had a determined Haru in his vicinity slammed into his mind and... Rin swallowed dryly and scowled when Haru's lips quirked in a tiny smirk. They broke their gaze at the same time to turn to Makoto, who'd reddened. "Er..." Rin could have sworn Makoto looked tempted for a brief second there. Just a little bit. "I thought you might want to go swimming together, or something like that. For starters."

Haru nodded as soon as the word swimming was mentioned and that, Rin thought wryly, seemed that. He'd rather stick to normal dates, anyway. Just in case – nay, for when things crashed and burned. If he thought that often enough he could probably convince his hormones the same. Probably.

"Fine. Where?"

Rin's question was met with two pairs of eyes fixed on him like they were surprised he hadn't figured out the answer already. "I have the keys to the swimming pool at Iwatobi," Makoto pointed out patiently while Haru gave him a look that questioned his intelligence. "And it's Sunday, so as long as we're careful..."

"Only we ever use it, anyway." Haru was already standing up. "Come on."

* * *

Confession time: after first watching the series, I actually didn't think about Makoto/Rin AT ALL until I read **Ad_Astra**'s _**This Gentle Heart Will Mess You Up**_ and _**Denial is Not Just a River in Egypt**_. Well, I found those after **"Your Body is a Map of Sin,"** so you can guess how my mind progresses in terms of pairings. lol Important point is: my affection for Makoto/Rin side of the pairing is entirely thanks to Ad_Astra's delicious stories. For those lovely stories, please visit **Archive of Our Own** and search for **Ad_Astra**!


	4. Chapter 4

...oh snap, did I make Rin _cry?_ Uh, whoops?

* * *

They had to stop by Makoto's house on the way. For one, Rin hadn't packed his legskin because he hadn't expected a talk about their screwed up relationship (or the lack thereof) would lead to a date at the pool. Though in hindsight perhaps he should have, given the parties involved. Haru had offered, but Haru only ever wore jammers (and all in the same design), and it'd have been too small for Rin, anyway. Makoto's would be a little loose on him, but Rin wasn't quite ready to go skinny-dipping with them just yet. Best not to give Haru any ideas, he thought.

Of course once they were at Iwatobi they got caught right away by the caretaker, because Haru had a habit of walking straight toward any body of water without so much as glancing at what stood between him and his goal. So Makoto had to explain they were here for a totally pre-authorized session of extra training, looking like earnestness personified as he single-handedly convinced the skeptical caretaker. Which was disturbing on so many levels. Rin sincerely felt uneasy for the fate of the world should Makoto ever decide to use his fearsome proselytizing abilities for evil. After all Makoto was already using them for questionable good.

Fortunately, Iwatobi's swimming pool was on a fairly isolated part of the school grounds, and completely deserted when they arrived. Haru immediately stripped and headed straight for the pool, at which point Rin turned to Makoto for a mute plea for explanation. When the hell had Haru put on swimsuit under his clothes?

Makoto shrugged with a smile. "He does that all the time. I'm not sure if he ever wears anything else under his clothes these days."

"Freak," Rin said, but without heat. Besides, he got to watch Makoto change and he could never complain about that. Makoto's lower back was a temptation incarnate at the best of the times. A couple of minutes later Rin had to leave first because if he watched Makoto bend over one more time he would be swimming with a boner.

In the pool, Haru was circling underwater like a dolphin, unhurried, ethereally graceful. Rin dove in to join him, and Haru kept pace with him until they turned at the wall and headed back to the diving blocks. Neither of them was moving at full speed, and it was...weird, swimming side by side with Haru, but without the element of competition. Just moving in the water. Feeling the water with his whole body. Feeling its caress.

When they touched the wall, Makoto was sitting on the diving block, watching them with a fond expression. "It's so odd to see you two swimming without racing." Then he added thoughtfully, "Odd, but nice."

That was pretty much the sum of how Rin felt, so he shrugged. "Are you coming in?"

Makoto, in lieu of an answer, dove over Rin's head. Makoto's front crawl wasn't bad. Actually, Makoto was pretty good with all strokes. He was fastest with the backstroke, but he'd always been a model student and was adept at all styles. Actually they'd all learned the different strokes as kids; it was just that Rin was best at the butterfly stroke, while Nagisa preferred the more playful flow of breaststroke, and Makoto the backstroke. Come to think of it, it was only Haru who refused to swim any style but the front crawl.

When Makoto returned to the diving blocks, Rin had his elbow perched on the line watching Haru lazily spin underwater. "Is _he_ ever going to learn any other stroke?" Rin asked, tossing his head in Haru's direction. "As it is, he could either do freestyle or medley relay, but nothing else."

Makoto shook the water out of his hair. "Well. Haru's never been interested in learning specific styles. You know he only started swimming in the relay because of you." His mouth quirked in a rueful smile. "As for competition, it's not like I could enter other categories, either. Everyone has a favored style."

"You could—"

"But not to win," Makoto interrupted him gently. "Not to say winning is everything. But I think a healthy competition is a good thing. For that, you need to be at a comparable level with others. I know I'm not, with the front crawl or the butterfly. For the breaststroke, Nagisa beats me by four or five seconds these days." The look Makoto gave him was knowing. "You're best at butterfly, but you're very graceful at freestyle, too, you know. You could compete with either one."

Rin looked away. "But the upcoming meet at the national..." He'd originally limited himself to the 100-meter freestyle, which Haru also entered. But he'd lost during the regional, and wasn't competing in the national. Samezuka's medley relay team had won during its wave, and Mikoshiba hinted he would be willing to let Rin swim for the team, but – Iwatobi wouldn't be there. They weren't going to swim together, as same team or rival teams.

"Will you be in the medley relay?" Makoto asked, voice just gentle enough turn Rin's gaze back to him. "Because Haru and I would love to come cheer you on. So would Nagisa. And Rei and Kou-chan, too."

"I don't know yet," Rin replied honestly. "Mikoshiba-buchou hinted he might let me."

The understanding in Makoto's eyes _hurt_. "Rin, just remember: when you swim, you're swimming for the team whether or not we're in the water with you. We'll always come see you, all right?"

Rin could feel heat in his neck and face and had to look away. Makoto's hand was a shock of warmth against his cheek. Rin started, feeling another pair of eyes on him, and found Haru staring at him, just his eyes visible over the water.

"'My thoughts exactly,' Haru's thinking," Makoto supplied when Haru didn't speak, and Haru, to Rin's shock, did not dispute the claim even as he shot Makoto a withering look.

Haru spun like an eel, once against underwater, and surfaced halfway down the lane, the front crawl like a natural extension of his movement. Near the end of the lane Haru circled again and returned, surfacing next to Rin and Makoto. "Do the butterfly," Haru said in a complete non-sequitur, and both Makoto and Rin blinked.

"Huh? Why?"

Haru just looked at him. "I want to see."

"But you saw me. Back at the regional," Rin pointed out.

"That was different." Rin stared at him, brows knitted, but Haru stubbornly held his gaze. "Do it."

Makoto, when Rin glanced over at him quizzically, just smiled with a one-shouldered shrug. Rin gave a mental shrug. It was no hardship, and this was probably the first time Haru made such a request. Rin pulled out of the water and stepped on the diving block. No signal, no one saying anything, just him, the water waiting below, and Haru's bright blue eyes watching. Haru was in his lane, right under him, looking up like they were just switching during a relay. It was signal enough.

Rin dove.

Rin's legs could have segued into the trademark undulating kicks of butterfly stroke in his sleep. Not sliding through, like front crawl, but darting up and down in the water. More dynamic, perhaps even showy, with forceful arm movement and concerted leg movement. And Rin, with his powerful kicks, had always been best suited for this.

Maybe at heart he'd always wanted to show off, a little, especially to Haru. Because Rin had always preferred the butterfly even as he liked the front crawl for its sheer speed. But freestyle was Haru's. This – butterfly was Rin's. So Rin concentrated on the movement, on gaining the kick and pull to achieve more grace and power than simple speed.

When he touched the wall, Haru was waiting in the next lane, eyes intent. On the other side was Makoto, frank appreciation in his eyes. "That was beautiful," Makoto told him while Rin pulled off the cap to shake the water out of his hair. "Your butterfly is always beautiful to watch, you know."

Whatever Haru thought, he kept it to himself, but he was still watching Rin with unnerving intensity. Makoto glanced over at him, and chuckled. "For the record, I think I've only ever seen Haru give that look to bodies of water."

Haru huffed, but did not deny it. Then, slowly, Haru extended a hand toward him.

Rin was too startled to wonder what the gesture meant. But Haru was patient, holding out his hand, and Rin hesitantly raised his own to graze Haru's fingers with his own. Haru shared no such uncertainty, and immediately laced his fingers with Rin's. "Haru—"

Unexpectedly, Haru smiled. "That," he said. "That was what I wanted."

"You really need to stop making everything into swimming analogies," Rin said when he finally found his voice. Behind him, water swished softly as Makoto crossed the lane to join them, a gentle warmth just shy of pressing against his body.

Which felt nice, but wasn't necessarily a good thing, because when Haru moved closer, Rin had nowhere left to go except into Makoto's waiting arms. Which wrapped around him so carefully, Rin didn't have the heart to break out of the hold. And Haru was undeterred, pressing closer to brush his lips against Rin's.

The kiss was chaste and there was no rhyme or reason Rin should let out a faintest groan. But somehow it felt incomparably more sensual than the time Haru kissed him on his bed. Makoto's arms were strong, supporting him, cradling him while Haru's tongue traced his ear. Haru was definitely aroused when he pressed against Rin, but there was no urgency in the way Haru's fingertips skimmed down Rin's chest. Warm palms smoothed over his stomach, ran down his clothed thighs, and Rin clenched his teeth against another moan, irrationally wanting the legskin gone so he could feel the touch on his bare skin. His knees chose that moment to buckle, but Makoto had him well at hand, taking his weight easily.

When strong hands squeezed his waist, his moan turned open and full-throated. Couldn't help it. Haru _looked_ pretty. But he had really strong hands. Despite being shorter than Rin, Haru still kept up with him stroke for stroke, and Rin secretly suspected Haru might win against him in a straight-out arm-wrestling contest. Just now those strong fingers were pressing hard into the unprotected flesh of his waist, tearing more sounds from him. Then, Haru really started going for it and kneaded his hips, and Rin couldn't help it. "Wait," Rin gasped, fingers scrabbling against Haru's forearms. "Ha-Haru, stop."

Haru's brows furrowed with a silent question, but Makoto – when had he ended up with his head resting against Makoto's shoulder? – shook his head. "We're at a public place," Makoto reminded them, and Rin groaned. That was it? No remonstration about moving too fast, no lecture on how they should maybe slow this down a bit? And more disturbing still, Haru just looked more determined.

"I like it better here. In the water."

Of course he did. Makoto's laughter sent quiet vibration in Rin's ear. "Of course you do, Haru. But we'll be arrested if anyone catches us like this."

"You're not helping, Makoto," Rin growled. It might have been more effective if his voice hadn't been so unsteady.

"Sorry." Makoto then shifted his grip on Rin, pulling him up, and of course the process brought their bodies together and – oh. _Oh._ Rin, and he was supposed to be the more worldly and experienced one here, blushed from head to toe. Somehow, despite having Haru unabashedly press against him only seconds ago, realizing it affected Makoto also was—

"Locker room?" Haru suggested innocently, and Rin glared.

"No!"

"We're going to have to wait, Haru," Makoto chided, but sounded like he was suppressing his laughter.

"Until?"

Damn, Rin hadn't expected Haru to be so single-minded. Briefly he wondered if Haru had put Makoto up to the whole talking him into a threesome thing.

Had he just thought threesome?

"Until Rin says yes."

Haru gave Rin a speculative look. "Rin won't say no," Haru said, and it sounded like equal parts promise and threat.

"I'm standing right here, you know," Rin snapped, only to have Haru ignore him. Haru really riled him sometimes.

Makoto let out a long-suffering sigh, but Rin could hear a huff of laughter hidden underneath. "That's not the same thing as saying yes. Come on. Don't you want to swim some more before we head back?"

This was Haru, after all. After another considering look at the two of them, Haru did a corkscrew dive back under the water, and started swimming again. Rin felt an irrational stab of disappointment that Haru didn't press the point. Which was stupid. He wasn't planning on having a threesome sex in the pool. He'd never be able to enter another pool again without remembering – things. Also, he hadn't consented to sleeping with either of them yet, let alone both. If – when – this whole thing blew up in their faces, the awkwardness would be so much less if they didn't add sex to the equation.

All those things made perfect sense in his mind. Even if they failed to distract him from Makoto pressed on his back. Or the heat nestled against his ass. It had been so damned _long_...! Rin bit back a needy moan forming in the back of his throat, and refused to let his mind dwell on how easy it would be to push down their legskins just enough for this.

Makoto let out a breath that wasn't entirely steady. "Um. Sorry. I'm letting go now, okay?"

Rin's legs held him, thank God, and he sighed in relief. Possibly also in disappointment. But mostly relief. He couldn't help stealing a look at Makoto, who was still blushing faintly. And oh-so-gorgeous. Rin's heart started doing the odd pitter-patter thing with flips, and of _course_ Haru chose that moment to swim right up to Makoto. Rin wasn't even an arm's length away, not having moved after Makoto released him, and Haru wasn't shy about their bodies touching. Even when he pretty much climbed on Makoto to kiss him. And Makoto, being Makoto, automatically caught Haru in his arms. Rin was abruptly reminded of the time an enthusiastic Nagisa jumped Haru after they qualified for the regional, wrapping his legs around Haru's waist with careless exuberance. Haru wasn't quite there yet, but getting close. Makoto's hands slid down Haru's back, loving rather than demanding. Rin's arousal hadn't faded, although it had lessened, and now threatened a full comeback. How would it feel to have Haru cling to him like that? To have Makoto hold him up so lovingly as they kissed?

"You sure?" Haru murmured, and Makoto looked a great deal more troubled than when Rin was the one cornered by those blue eyes. Still, Makoto looked at Rin in askance, which – okay, so at least they were serious about wanting to include him. "Because if you say yes, Rin will say yes," Haru added. Rin sputtered, but couldn't manage to voice a denial. So Haru hadn't given up. He was probably just consulting the water about how to convince Rin and Makoto, or something. Damn the stubborn water-obsessed idiot.

"You sure _you_ don't want to be dating the pool instead?" Rin asked, only to have Haru blink innocently at him.

"The water doesn't mind sharing."

Clearly insanity was catching, because that probably shouldn't make as much sense to Rin as it did. Rin sighed, tugging a hand through his hair. "Well?" he addressed Makoto. "Since Haru here is determined to think with his dick, that is."

Haru glared. "You want to."

"Never denied it. But your hormones have addled your brain and you're not thinking clearly. You're going to wake up and realize all this was a mistake."

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say. Haru let go of Makoto and stepped back, eyes like glaciers. "Don't," Haru said, and his voice pitched low, but with all the chill of the arctic. "You know nothing about what I want. If you're too scared to accept that's your problem." The phrasing was deliberate, Rin realized, remembering he'd used those exact words to Haru before. But Haru wasn't finished. "I've never wanted anyone but Makoto and you. I want this. I want you." This time, Haru's gaze was as much an invitation as a challenge. "What do _you_ want, Rin?"

To have the last four years never have happened. To go back to the way they were. To never be apart from them again. To never be so _alone_ as he'd been in Australia ever again. For Makoto and Haru to be his. To be theirs.

"Rin." Makoto's achingly tender look was harder to bear than Haru's straightforward challenge. "Did you kiss me only because you expected me to reject you?"

Rin could not answer. To deny would be a lie. But to admit was unbearable. "This can never work out," Rin finally whispered, throat too tight to manage anything louder. His chest ached, his whole body ached, the water a sudden chill winding through every inch of his skin. "I'd rather keep being your friend than not have this work out and lose you both."

They were still close enough to touch, and Rin wasn't entirely surprised to feel hands catch him by the arms and draw him closer, Haru on his left, Makoto on the right. Makoto looked like he badly wanted to pull both of them in a hug, but gave Rin a heartbreakingly sweet smile instead. "I'm not guaranteeing this _will_ work out for all of us," Makoto started, all but murmuring directly in Rin's ear. "I don't think anyone can. But I can never believe any pain or awkwardness could be worse than not having you two in my life." A kiss pressed to his temple, and Rin had to close his eyes, because he couldn't pull away, not when Makoto and Haru both clung to him so stubbornly. "Please, Rin." Makoto's voice softened to just barely above a whisper. "Stay."

Haru dropped a kiss on his shoulder that silently echoed Makoto's request, the undemanding touch more eloquent than any words. Rin shuddered, and was immediately drawn into Makoto's arms, instantly followed by Haru's wrapping around them both. Confusion of hands touching him, brushing back his hair, mapping the skin of his back, his arms. Despite himself, a tear escaped him, then another. Warm lips caught his tears – Makoto's, he realized with shock – while another pair of lips pressed at the back of his neck. He was enveloped in warmth, surrounded by it. Was drowning in heat and something else that filled every part of him. Something inescapable. Irresistible. His surrender was inevitable. And for once Rin didn't even mind.

"Yes," he whispered, and let go, trusting both of them to catch him.

* * *

The next chapter is the reason for the overall rating. It's also the longest chapter. (And the raison d'etre of this fanfiction.) Says a lot about my priorities, don't it? :D Unfortunately, I'm expecting a really busy week, so the next update will next Sunday at the earliest, probably a day or two later. :( Sorry.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry for the extended wait, folks! I fell sick last weekend and am still feeling under the weather. x_x

Two things. Firstly, when I said M-rating, I meant that. This chapter is NSFW, etc.

Secondly, I'm pretty fluid with positions. This chapter just happened this way, but it's not going to happen the same way every time.

Now that I've teased you with notes...the REAL reason I wrote this fic.

* * *

"That was _not_ a yes to _this_," Rin growled. Haru, and this was fast becoming a habit, ignored him. Admittedly, if Rin had a gasping nearly naked Makoto sprawled under him, he probably would have ignored everything else, too.

Once they were back, Haru had been quite unabashed about taking them to the living room overlooking the garden, briskly laying out the futons together. Makoto had the grace to blush, but all he added was for Haru to close the screens, which also went ignored because Haru chose that moment to draw Makoto down to the futon and kiss him senseless.

Haru had stripped the moment the futons were laid out and was dressed only in his jammers. (Rin planned to have a talk with Makoto about that particular habit.) Rin's shirt was draped carelessly over the TV where Haru had tossed it. Makoto's shirt was flung somewhere, possibly in the garden. His pants were hanging by one ankle, which Haru was now pulling off impatiently.

"Rin," Makoto gasped, and Rin crawled forward to catch his name on Makoto's lips as it was repeated. "Haru, slow down—"

Haru's tongue down one's throat was quite effective as a gag. Rin should know; Haru had used it on him before. Speaking of Haru's tongue down Makoto's throat. The fact his thought from weeks ago turned out prophetic was a faint triumph in Rin's mind. But before they went any further, particularly if Haru never dated before, they should probably establish some ground rules. Preferably before Haru climbed on top of Makoto and started grinding away. Because Haru looked like he was contemplating exactly that.

"Oy, Haru, let Makoto up. I have to ask something."

Haru pulled away only with visible reluctance, and turned to Rin with a look smoldering in his eyes, that Rin had better make this worthwhile. Rin shook his head. Hormonal, frustrated virgins, oy. What would they have done without him? "How far do you want to go?" he asked, both to Haru and to Makoto. He'd gone all the way before, on both ends. He highly doubted Makoto or Haru had.

Makoto looked like he was having trouble getting enough oxygen to his brain to think, but managed to sit up. "I was going to ask you the same." Makoto's voice was remarkably steady for someone whose eyes were currently only thin rims of green around wide pupils. "It's not just me and Haru, you know. What do _you_ like, Rin?"

Rin's eyes were drawn to Makoto's front like iron filings to a magnet. More specifically, the bulge straining against the cotton briefs. He'd only had a chance to feel it through layers of clothing before, but it was probably impressive. The thought of Makoto's cock in his ass sent a jolt of hot desire wash through him, and Rin let out a sound he refused to call a whimper. Haru was watching him closely, though, and Rin nearly jumped out of his skin when Haru unceremoniously stuck a hand down his pants. The touch was a little too rough, but it was hard to mind when Haru's intention was clearly to pull his pants off. Haru disengaged only long enough to throw the offending garment across the room. Then, Haru was pushing him forward until he was nearly on top of Makoto, who pulled him close like it was already second nature. Makoto's hands, large and warm, were skimming down his back, but careful not to stray too far down his spine. Rin whined in frustration, wanting those hands lower.

Haru must had learned to read minds from all his crazy conversations with water or something, though, because he grabbed Makoto's hands and dragged them lower until they settled on Rin's ass. "Rin liked it before, when I touched him here," Haru commented, kneading his hips just so, and Rin turned liquid under his hand, swaying with the touch. Makoto's hands squeezed lightly, the motion unconscious, almost abortive, and Rin moaned and squirmed, needing more.

"You can—" Rin wasn't sure who he was addressing now. Either one. Maybe both. "You can—put it inside. If you want."

Makoto was holding back, Rin thought the next moment, breathless and dizzy, when Makoto squeezed his ass _hard_. Makoto immediately let go with an apology, but he didn't quite take his hands off Rin's ass, either, by which Rin guessed Makoto definitely had an interest in Rin's offer. Haru was pressed against his side, mouth mapping Rin's shoulder, and Rin shook his head, trying to clear his desire-fogged mind. Something about the logistics of having three people, because if Makoto was inside him, where did that leave Haru?

"Makoto." Rin had a moment of déjà vu, seeing the two of them seemingly communicate entirely with a short exchange of looks. Whatever their telepathic discussion was about, Haru settled it with an infinitesimal shake of head. "Rin first, today."

Rin wondered if he was supposed to understand what that meant when Makoto lay back and Haru unceremoniously pulled off Rin's boxers without so much as a warning. Before he could get indignant, however, Makoto was already pulling at him, Haru pushing at the same time, guiding Rin to straddle Makoto. That finished, Makoto turned toward Haru. "Haru..."

Whatever Makoto meant, Haru seemed to divine it. Without a word Haru rose and disappeared, leaving Rin gasping into Makoto's mouth as Makoto kissed him, unhurried and thorough. When Haru returned, Makoto smiled and extended a hand toward him, which Haru took. Makoto brought their joined hands to his lips, leaving a kiss on Haru's knuckles. Then, Haru was behind him again, palms moving over Rin's bare ass. "You'll have to talk me through," Haru murmured in his ear, and Rin shivered, more at the tone than the words.

Rin was about to ask just what he would have to talk Haru through when fingers, slick with something cool and slippery, touched his entrance. "Ah...!" Rin arched, startled and turned on, and twisted to look at Haru, who looked back at him with a completely serious expression. Ah. So that was what Haru meant by talking him through. Rin felt a fierce heat wash over his neck and chest, spreading up to his face, and let out a gasped curse. He'd have to – explain what to do. In words. So Haru could prepare him while Makoto – dressed only in briefs with his cock poking its head out – watched them from below. Fuck.

Haru's fingers circled Rin's entrance again, spreading whatever he was using or possibly just teasing Rin. Knowing Haru it was a toss-up. "Rin," Haru said, drawing out the simple sound to a question. Rin shuddered, feeling Haru's fingers dip, just hard enough to press into his opening, too turned on to care about goddamned logistics anymore. "Rin."

"Put—fingers in me," Rin gasped out, some semblance of coherence returning to his mind. It _had_ been a while. Tempting as it was to just have Makoto shove it inside, tomorrow was a school day and he'd regret it sorely when it came to club practice. "Take it slow. Fuck—!" Rin's voice cut off in a moan when Haru's finger pushed past the ring of muscles. No hesitation, only certainty. It burned, a little, the unanticipated stretch, but he'd done this before. Rin knew he could convince his body to stop panicking, relax and enjoy the hard stretch of something foreign inside. "More, Haru. Deeper," Rin instructed, and felt Haru comply, pushing in two fingers, not pausing until they were inside as deep as they could go. Haru gave him a round of shallow thrusts, and Rin nearly swallowed his own tongue, shaking with an incoherent sound in his throat.

Makoto sat up on his elbows to reach Rin's mouth, and Rin moaned openly. Makoto's hands were on him, steadying him. "Are you okay?" Makoto asked, his hand on Rin's cock so much gentler than Haru's earlier, but Rin was too close and could only shake his head.

"Too close," Rin gasped, and Makoto stopped fondling him, moving his hands to knead at Rin's hips instead, fingers caressing just hard enough to press into skin. Even that made him shudder. His body was too sensitive, it'd been too long, and Makoto was staring up at him like a starving man offered a feast. Rin was so turned on it hurt. Haru kissed him between shoulder blades, and Rin arched his back, spine flexing. Then Haru pressed another finger inside and curled them, touching the place inside that set off fireworks along his nerves, and Rin cried out sharply. The hell – and Haru had never done this before? Either Haru had one hell of an imagination (and that was hard to picture), or someone had done some research about this. Haru did that again, and Rin had no breath to cry out this time. "Stop. Too..." he gasped out, and mercifully, Haru stopped, sticking to shallow thrusts which dwindled to half-turns.

Makoto's thumb brushed over a hipbone tenderly as he watched Rin in visible concern. "Are you sure you're ready? We can finish it this way. We've got time."

Trust Makoto to be concerned more about his partner than himself. If Makoto's eyes weren't so dark and firmly fixed where Haru's fingers penetrated Rin, one might even have believed him. But Rin wasn't going to waste his first time with them, he'd wanted this too long. So Rin shook his head adamantly. "Just – do it."

Having an extra partner was good for at least one thing, like undressing the other partner when Rin was too distracted to do it himself. Haru took off Makoto's briefs with much more gentleness than he'd used with Rin, which was interesting, if not quite unexpected. Then Haru reached over to slick Makoto's cock, and Rin could watch Makoto close his eyes and let his head fall back with a groan. Mm, pretty. Makoto's throat worked while Haru stroked him, presumably to slick him up, but for all Rin knew, Haru could be doing it for the same reason Rin would: to watch Makoto moan and tense under his touch. God, but Makoto was gorgeous like this.

Finally, however, it seemed Haru was done teasing them both, and pushed Rin's hips down. Rin swatted at his hands. "I got it," he said, a bit annoyed. Honestly. He was the experienced one here.

"I want to," Haru said simply, and Rin couldn't help softening at that. Still, Haru at least knew enough to back off and let Rin take it at his own pace for the next part. Rin took a deep breath and reached for Makoto's cock – impressive as expected – and pressed until he felt his muscles give. It ached, a little; it had been a while and Makoto wasn't small, but he was too impatient to take this slower. He held himself still, letting his body open up a little more, then sank down. Probably faster than he should, but then since when did Matsuoka Rin ever do what he was supposed to? He leaned forward to rest his hands on Makoto's chest, his body shaking a bit too much to continue without a break, and heard Makoto let out a strangled groan. Rin looked at him, at the tight expression of wonder, arousal and desperation. In effort not to move, Rin realized with exasperated affection. To give Rin time to adjust. Then – and Rin was really beginning to suspect Haru was evil changeling and possibly a latent sex maniac – Haru slicked them where they were joined, making both of them moan. And Makoto's hands grasped him by the hips, and that seemed like a good signal as any. Tentatively, Rin rose up a little, then sank down, and _holy shit_. Rin moaned shamelessly, and did that again. And again.

"Makoto, move...!" Rin gritted out between moans. The next moment Makoto slammed upward, and Rin's voice rose sharply in pitch and volume. He was so full, speared open, almost skirting the edge of pain but never quite there, with jolt of pleasure lighting up his spin with each thrust. Someone was making obscene sounds, and Makoto was really grinding into him now. Rin jumped when Haru's fingers casually flicked over his nipple, so sensitive that even a light touch was almost too much. Haru's hand was bold, skimming over his stomach, tracing hard muscles there, then down, to fondle his cock with more care than before. Rin tensed, a sound too desperate to be called a moan torn from his throat, shaking. Makoto was making another strangled sound under him, hands tightening on his hips, but it seemed even Makoto's infinite patience was at an end. The next moment, Makoto pulled him down sharply, slamming against him now. His hips jerked helplessly between Makoto fucking him raw and Haru stroking him with a swift and sure touch. The pleasure was almost too much, enough to drown him. Haru's fingers plucked at a nipple, then moved to his lower back, stroking down, making him arch.

Then further down to trace the rim of flesh stretched wide around Makoto's cock, then pressed _just so_ and the fingertips started to enter right along Makoto's cock.

Everything went white at that point, and Rin was conscious of nothing for what must had been seconds, but felt like an eternity. When he came to, Makoto was hammering against him desperately, and Haru had an arm around him, supporting him, keeping him mostly upright while Makoto ground hard into him and came with a sound like a scream with teeth clenched. Rin made a helpless sound, watching Makoto shudder underneath like he was falling to pieces in an exquisite agony of pleasure. Rin knew he would never forget that image for as long as he lived.

Then Haru gently lowered him, and Rin sank forward gratefully. He was pretty sure his limbs would not support his weight. Makoto was panting in his ear, skin hot and slick with sweat, chest heaving under Rin's. Makoto's cock was still inside him, and the thought made him tighten reflexively, like a jolt of awareness, until Makoto made a pained sound. "Rin," Makoto whimpered his name, and it was the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard. Rin smiled, not bothering to open his eyes. "Are you...are you okay?"

"I don't think Rin was screaming from pain," Haru commented dryly from somewhere above them. Rin stirred, but found his body completely and totally uncooperative. "Given how hard he came."

Oh, so that was what the sticky mess on Makoto's belly was. He'd... Rin might have blushed if he wasn't glowing steadily already. "Fine," Rin mumbled. "Just...gimme a minute." His mouth was reasonably close to Makoto's ear. He was sure Makoto would get it. Either way Rin wasn't moving until he was good and ready. Makoto rubbed his back gently, which felt nice, and Rin was almost drifting when Makoto spoke again.

"Haru?" Makoto called softly. "What about – do you want to—"

There was someone else's hand running over his back, and Rin made a tired noise, not even bothering to twitch. But there was an inquiry in that touch. A question.

"I want to try that," Haru said, voice still quiet, but laced with a hint of something unfamiliar.

There must be something about Haru that sparks eternal feelings of rivalry in Rin. Either that or he had enough time to recover and his brain was now able to process nuances again. "With?" he drawled. Rin didn't think it would be a smart idea for either Makoto or Haru to go all the way on their first try. Well, they could, but would probably end up regretting it tomorrow.

Though it might be funny if Haru had to sit out on the club practice because he was too sore to swim.

"Rin," Haru murmured, voice lower, almost hypnotic, and the hand caressing his back had turned slower and more sensual. An enticement more than a question, now. Then Haru's hand moved down, and Rin couldn't mistake what Haru wanted.

Rin could refuse. Haru could press, and Rin suspected he would, but Rin could just say no.

"Haru, I don't think... Why don't I—" Makoto again.

Rin managed to lift his head on the second try. "Only if you want to take the day off tomorrow."

Makoto's hands massaged his lower back, soothing. "Will _you_ be okay, Rin?"

Rin sighed. So much for the afterglow. He shifted and deliberately relaxed, letting Makoto slip out of him. A small hiss escaped him despite his effort. As mind-blowing as it had been, his body was beginning to protest. Makoto made a noise that was almost a whine, like a puppy being deprived of a favorite toy, and his mind was so very much not going there if Rin could help it. Rin sat up gingerly, surveying himself. He might end up with finger-shaped bruises in interesting places tomorrow, but hopefully those weren't noticeable at a quick glance. At least nobody left hickeys on his throat. Those would have made it way too obvious what he'd been up to over the weekend. "Unless Haru marked my back, yeah."

"I mean..." Makoto was blushing. Hard. "I didn't...hurt you, did I?"

For some odd reason the question embarrassed him and Rin looked away briefly to compose himself. They'd just had sex, though. He might as well be honest, particularly if they planned to make this a regular thing. "No. It's just been a while. I'll be a little sore tomorrow, but it won't be too bad." Haru was still keeping a hand on his back, though. And Haru _had_ waited patiently. "Want me to blow you?" he asked Haru bluntly.

Haru looked from Makoto to Rin, then back to Makoto again. Makoto looked guilty, and gave a little wince, all but squirming under Haru's look. "I did say Rin first, today," Haru said finally, and Makoto looked rather relieved.

"Oh, not you too," Rin growled. It was bad enough Makoto was so good at guilt-tripping him into agreeing with whatever they wanted. Now Haru wanted to ride the guilt-trip-Rin-into-submission bandwagon too?

Also, it wasn't going to work, damn it.

Dependable Makoto was dependable, particularly when coming to a friend's rescue. "How about you do it with me instead?" Makoto cajoled, and it was disturbing how similar he sounded to the times he was trying to convince Haru to eat something other than mackerel. "What if Rin can't swim tomorrow?"

Ooh, big guns. If there was one thing that Haru couldn't bear, it was the thought of no swimming.

"Would you be able to anyway?" Haru asked Rin, almost innocent if it hadn't been for the context of the question. "Makoto's rather—"

Yes, Makoto was rather big, and no, Rin did not need the reminder, thank you very much. Rin groaned for what felt like fiftieth time that day. "You really wanna be inside me that much?"

Haru shrugged, but his blue eyes, when Rin caught them, were alight with interest. Stupid virgin idiots. Always with the reckless abstinence business until hormones addled their brains and left them desperate to jump the nearest warm body. "You were beautiful in the water," Haru said, and – okay, Rin hadn't expected that. That it was _Rin_ that Haru wanted, not just sex. "And out of it. With Makoto," Haru added because he was a manipulative bastard. Rin really hadn't expected Haru to be any good at sweet-talking. Or maybe Rin was too easily seduced. "I want to see you like that again."

Now that was just plain unfair. Rin could almost feel his resolve weaken. But damn, Rin _was_ hoping he could swim tomorrow. Well, he could, but he probably wouldn't be fast, which was worse. And he was still trying to convince Mikoshiba that he should be in the relay lineup for the nationals. But then Makoto really might try to fumble his way through with Haru. Ah, hell. Letting Haru have his way would be easier than trying to coach both idiots at the same time. Rin made a mental note to have Makoto and Haru look up the mechanics of anal sex for their next time. Hopefully they were both well acquainted with Google. Haru seemed to be, anyway.

"Just this once," Rin said gruffly. "And only because both of you don't know what you're doing. I'm not doing this again." With that obligatory disclaimer, Rin moved away from Makoto to lie down on his back. The look Haru gave him, half surprised and half uncertain, was enough to placate his ego, that Haru wasn't taking him for granted. Good. Matsuoka Rin didn't roll over for just anyone. With a smirk, he spread his legs, keeping his eyes locked with Haru's. "Well?"

Rin could have sworn Haru's eyes _sparkled_. Hand to God. Like sunlight striking water. Then they darkened, and Rin braced himself to be jumped, but instead Haru moved to kneel between his legs with surprising restraint. Next to him, Makoto sat up, peering down at Rin worriedly. "Are you sure you'll be—"

"Oh for... I'll be _fine_, you can blow me after if you're so worried," Rin snapped, but couldn't quite keep the affection from his voice.

"I'll try," Makoto promised so readily, Rin almost felt guilty before remembering blowjobs were a very, very good thing. One could never have too many of those.

Haru caressed his thighs just like he'd done in the pool before, but there was a whisper of uncertainty in his touch now. Rin let out a short and impatient sigh. "Haru, if you're not sure what to do, _ask_."

"Should I," Haru started, then halted. "Do the same thing as before?"

Rin lifted himself on his elbows to spear him with a look. "You mean stretch me? No. Just use more lube. I should be still..."

That was when Haru lunged at him and took his mouth. And there were strangled, obscene sounds escaping Haru. Okay, maybe that was a bit flattering, too. To have Haru lapping at him like he couldn't get enough. Enough incentive, anyway, for Rin to lean back, anticipation thrumming through him again with surprising urgency, like he hadn't come just minutes ago. Haru's slick fingers reached between his legs, but instead of going for his ass it went to his cock. Haru's grip was light, more gliding than pumping, but it still made Rin jump. Like he needed the additional stimulation. Like it wasn't enough to have Haru devouring him with his eyes like Rin was the most delectable dish of mackerel ever to grace his table. And Haru was going for his entrance with his _other_ hand, spreading more lube and teasing with his fingers because Nanase Haruka was a fiend in disguise. Probably something aquatic. Then those fingers entered him, touching just deep enough to make him see stars. Rin was seriously beginning to suspect the whole Haru as an innocent virgin theory when Haru did it again, making him jerk with a gasp. And again.

"Haru," Makoto ground out, and he sounded thick even to Rin's distracted ears. "Stop teasing," Makoto finally managed, his hands caressing Rin's chest, running down his abdomen. Makoto was staring down at him like he wanted to do it all over again, and Rin strained upward, wanting Makoto's mouth on his again, and Makoto obliged him with an open-mouthed kiss, swallowing his moan. "Rin," Makoto whispered directly against his lips. "You're so beautiful."

It should have been embarrassing how happy that simple assessment made him. But Rin's spine was melting anyway, turning his body liquid under the warmth. Haru's hands were on his knees, urging his legs up and apart, and Rin complied easily. There was a tiny hint of tremor in Haru's hand when they smoothed over his thighs, which was deeply gratifying. The way Haru closed his eyes and bit his lower lip when Makoto reached over to help slick his cock shouldn't be so attractive, either. Rin held back a sigh and accepted the fact he was stupidly fond of both his idiot friends.

Rin was a bit sore when Haru entered him, but Haru wasn't quite as thick as Makoto. Hell, Rin had never had a partner who was quite as well built as Makoto. But the discomfort still made him wince, a little. His insides were hot, almost pulsing, and he could feel every inch sliding in deeper. Haru was shaking by the time he was fully inside, hunched over Rin, struggling to catch his breath. And a stray burst of tenderness made Rin reach up and caress the side of Haru's face. To his surprise, Haru turned his face to catch Rin's wrist with his lips. The next moment, shimmering dark blue eyes met Rin's.

That was all the warning Rin had before Haru pulled back and drove into him _hard_. Rin's surprised noise came out garbled and cut off, but damn if it wasn't hot, the way Haru stared down at him. And Rin's hips lifted on their own, moving against Haru in tandem, and then Makoto latched onto his mouth and he had no more breath to do anything but hold on desperately while Haru took him hard and deep.

Rin whimpered into Makoto's mouth, who was kissing him like he wanted to taste every sound Rin made. Haru, despite his clear impatience, did not move fast. But Haru wasn't gentle, either, each thrust deep and slow and rough, making Rin feel every inch of Haru's cock as it pulled out and pushed back inside with an exquisite burn. Rin nearly bit down on Makoto's tongue in his mouth, making muffled sounds, but Makoto only moaned back. When Makoto pulled away, his green eyes were alight with fresh arousal, and he shared a searing and surprisingly ungentle kiss with Haru.

Makoto split the time between kissing Rin and Haru, but Haru's attention, even as he continued to thrust into Rin, was now on Makoto. Rin found out why when Makoto moaned between kisses, and sounded just like when he was inside Rin. Makoto was stroking himself, watching Haru fuck Rin with unabashed and rapt attention. Then everything became a confusing mess again, with Makoto's fingers tangled in his hair and Haru's tongue in his mouth and someone's hand on his cock and Haru, fucking him harder and faster now, fire stroking along his nerves—

For weeks to come Rin would deny he screamed himself hoarse as he came hard for the second time in less than fifteen minutes.

Afterward – because there was always an afterward – they fell asleep together for a nap, arms and legs tangled in a heap. Rin woke up briefly and found himself sandwiched between Makoto and Haru, Makoto whose cheek was pressed against his hair and Haru who'd turned over in his sleep with an arm thrown over Rin. Makoto's face was lax in his sleep, looking very much like an overgrown puppy snoozing. Even Haru looked younger, expression untroubled and not so serious. Rin couldn't help the tiny smile that pulled at his lips.

For the first time in a long time, Rin went to sleep feeling happy and not alone.

* * *

**Notes:**

So I've got an editorial decision to make here. Technically, when I first started this fic, getting together was pretty much the sole purpose, which means the fic should have ended here. As I was writing it didn't, but the later chapters were dragging and boring, hence the not-finishing. Possibly there will be more smut coming at the end, but that's all up in the air. They're also not finished at this time, which means slower updates. I might be better off just stopping here.

I haven't decided yet, so I'm leaving this fic marked incomplete for the moment. If I decide to stop here, I'll come back and mark it complete. If not, we'll see. Feel free to consider this the end if you like. =)

Thank you very much for all the follows, favorites, and reviews! Extra-special thanks if you reviewed more than once. :D

If you ever have a question or comment but don't feel up to leaving review/PM or don't have FanFiction-net account, I do have a Tumblr account: LeShaed. If you follow me there I'll probably bore you to tears, but I'll happily follow you back! :D


	6. Chapter 6

This chapter is basically a filler. Like most fillers it's boring. And for those who were happy with Ch 5 as the end, this chapter is probably not for you. Please note the Back button is above to your left. Remember: Back button a day keeps sanity at bay! Orz.

I may (possibly potentially maybe) post updates on my Tumblr account (leshaed). My Tumblr is also open to anonymous asks if anyone has any question/comment/concern/plain hate that cannot be expressed with reviews/PMs alone. :D

* * *

**_Chapter 6_**

Strictly in hindsight, Rin should have known better than to accept when Haru invited him to use the shower. Because Rin was right, Haru was totally a latent sex maniac and by shower Haru apparently meant a shower together. For all three of them. And did Rin mention Haru's bathroom wasn't that big? While he didn't object to rubbing up against wet and naked Makoto and Haru, hell, he really wasn't up for another round in the bathroom what with the dubious footing. Then of _course_ Haru wanted Makoto to make good on his word to blow Rin. Which Makoto did. With surprising skill, no less. Haru just commented something about popsicles practice, to which Makoto went red but didn't refute the point. If Rin were feeling less lethargic he might have been more curious about just what the other two have been doing with themselves in Rin's absence. But even Haru must have been tired, because after that Haru just got Makoto and himself off with a simple handjob while Rin watched.

To his credit Haru did offer to let them stay over, but Rin really needed to get back to Samezuka. Besides which, he wanted some time to think. Makoto still insisted on walking him to the train station despite protest, but Makoto also surprised him with a quick kiss before letting Rin go, so that was all right.

Once the train left the station, leaving behind a waving Makoto, Rin sat down. And promptly winced. Damn. He'd known he would regret it later, but now he was rethinking the whole swimming practice thing for tomorrow. They really were going to have to coordinate their trysts better. Or at least take turns missing practice next time.

Next time. He was already assuming there would be a next time.

True, neither Makoto nor Haru had looked panicked afterward. That wasn't to say there weren't so very many ways all this could go wrong. Not to mention it surprised Rin, his own willingness to accept both Makoto and Haru that way. His crush on Makoto was relatively recent, dated after his reconciliation with the group. Or possibly a little earlier, dated sometime after noticing Makoto's incredible back. His obsession with Haru wasn't new, but he hadn't thought it was anything but rivalry. The only thing that kept Rin from suspecting there was something in the water was the fact he _still_ didn't feel that way about Nagisa. In fact, when he tried to consider Nagisa that way, his mind's reaction could be summed up as a squicked _Eew_ like if he'd tried to have thoughts about Gou, maybe. Which, and this point warranted a virulently emphatic repetition, _EEW_. So no, it really was just Makoto and Haru.

Haru _said_ he wanted this. Haru wasn't the most expressive person in the world and when he did get verbal it could be kind of rude or exasperating, but Haru never said anything he didn't mean. Plus Haru did care about Rin and Makoto, that much Rin was sure. And Makoto was pretty good at keeping his word and he said no matter what, he would still be involved with Haru and Rin, right? Even if he still had some doubts (and Rin was definitely still convinced all this was doomed to failure), that much he could trust.

If there was a little bit of time before everything crashed and burned, he could enjoy himself until then. Right?

Just then, his phone chimed, alerting him of an incoming message. Rin took out his phone and saw a new text message from Makoto.

_Hope you have a safe trip home._

A smile curved his lips before he could stop himself, and Rin had to look around to make sure nobody caught him grinning like an idiot. But since he hadn't actually turned into a teenage girl yet, Rin made sure to wait until after he was in the dorm lobby to send his suitably manly reply.

_I did, thanks._

Makoto replied immediately. _You're welcome. Good night Rin!_

Rin hesitated, then texted back simply: _Good night._

Alright. While he wasn't willing to hold out hope that the three of them would work out in the end, maybe he could give them a few weeks.

With the thought in his mind, Rin whistled as he walked back to his room.

* * *

"Hang out?" Rin switched the phone to his other hand, trying to balance it between his shoulder and his ear while he continued to go through his drawer. "This Saturday? Sure. Where – no, I can come over, you and Haru live closer to the mall than I do anyway."

Makoto's voice, when it came, was a little too cheerful. Like he was nervous and trying to cover it up, maybe. "It's going to be just the two of us, Rin. Haru can't make it."

That sounded unlikely. For one, all of Haru's free time was split between the pool at school and the bathtub at home. Makoto was the one who had to split his time for family, friends, club, school and gazillion other things he did for other people on a routine basis. Also it was a Saturday. What could Haru possibly be doing on a Saturday that didn't involve Makoto?

"Haru said that?" Rin asked, suspicion creasing his brows.

"It was Haru's idea," Makoto said, just evasive enough to deepen Rin's suspicion.

Rin dropped what he was doing and sat down in his chair, taking the phone in his hand again. He'd said before that Haru would wake up and realize everything was a huge mistake. Haru hadn't ever been in a relationship before, let alone a three-way relationship. And they hadn't seen each other even once since the last time. Did Haru regret it? Was that why Makoto was left making excuses for him?

"Makoto."

"Yes?"

"You said you'll be there for us no matter what, yes? In whatever capacity?"

There was a short pause at the other end. "Yes. Of course."

Rin narrowed his eyes. "So. When you tell me Haru doesn't want to hang out with us—"

"Oh, no! It's not that. It's just—"

"—You'll tell me if it's because he regrets—"

"Rin, no. Really." Makoto's voice grew firm, and Rin stopped. "It's not that. It's just... Haru suggested that you and I go on a date. Just – just to see what it's like."

Rin considered this. "Just the two of us."

"Yes."

"But he's okay with the rest?"

Makoto actually laughed softly in his ear. "Yes, he's perfectly okay with the rest. I told you, it was Haru's idea. He really cares about you, and you said you..." Makoto's voice became softer and more hesitant again. "You said you like me, so Haru wanted us to have a date together."

From what Rin had seen, Haru had an unexpectedly strong streak of jealousy. Haru hadn't been happy at all to hear about Makoto's ex-girlfriend, and even questioned Rin's relationship with Nitori. The same Haru was arranging a date for just the two of them. Because Haru wanted to make him happy.

Rin was very glad they were on the phone. He was probably pulling a really stupid face just now. "So...am I going on a date with Haru next?"

"I suggested that. He said he'd like to, if you agree." Makoto let out a fond laugh. "Of course he immediately asked where he should take you for the date, but I thought maybe you two could figure it out together."

"We'll figure it out later." With Haru they could always have a date at a pool, he supposed, but Rin really didn't want their every date to be at a pool. There had to be some other place they could hang out that didn't involve water. "What about you and Haru? Where are you two going?" Just so he could make sure he and Haru went somewhere else. He could start there and brainstorm later.

"We're not?" Makoto...well, Rin had known Makoto since they were children. Makoto had liked Haru forever. They were finally together. Sort of. And Makoto wasn't taking Haru out for a date? "I mean, Haru and I hang out all the time and we spend way more time with each other than with you, so I didn't think he'd want to."

Rin raised an eyebrow. Like he was going to buy that. "Ask him out anyway. Haru's the one who's big on being even."

Makoto's voice, when it finally came, was soft, with something underneath that made Rin swallow to hear it. "Okay. Thank you, Rin."

Self-consciously, Rin dragged his free hand through his hair. "No prob. So: Saturday?"

"Yes. I'll come pick you up at ten." Then, Makoto hesitated for a second. "And if you want to go somewhere else, just tell me and we can change our plans, okay?"

Yeah, no. He was still not a teenage girl, thank you. "Meet you at the mall at ten," Rin corrected him, but didn't quite manage to sound stern. "There's no reason for you to waste a trip out here. I know my way around."

"Um. Right." Sheepish. "Sorry. D-did you have any place you want to visit?"

Rin shook his head, but couldn't help feeling fond. Stupid Makoto and his stupid old-fashioned boyfriend ethics. Makoto was probably going to show up half an hour early like a good date and pretend he just got there and then spend the rest of the day trying to make Rin happy. If Rin wasn't so idiotically head over heels over the boy, he might have felt annoyed at the presumption. "Tell you what. You pick a couple, and I'll pick a couple. We can figure out the rest as we go."

"Deal," Makoto agreed immediately. "I'll see you on Saturday."

"Yeah. See you."

After he hung up, Rin stretched in his chair. Now what did he have to wear that might be good for a date? Not that he was going to agonize over it unduly long, but he refused to look anything less than his best for this date. Because if Makoto's trend in boyfriend ethics held, Makoto was likely to dress up for the occasion. And if Rin had anything to say about it, they were going to be the best dressed pair at the mall come Saturday.

* * *

On Saturday, Makoto was waiting for him at the mall entrance all dressed up and early as expected. Rin tried not to feel too smug at the way Makoto stared at him speechlessly for a full minute.

"Hi. Um. You look really nice." Makoto cleared his throat, and there was a faint dusting of red high on his cheeks. "I mean, you always look nice but you look _really_ nice today, and..."

"Thanks. You look pretty good yourself." He was not a girl, Rin reminded himself. He was not going to glow at what was a perfectly justified comment regarding his appearance. Much. "Ready to go?"

After an entire morning together at the mall, Rin made a mental note to never visit the swimwear section with Makoto again. And the ice cream parlor. And the pet shop. Especially the pet shop. Makoto and kittens together really should come with a warning label. Honestly, it was a relief to sit down for lunch.

Makoto was getting their food while Rin staked out their table. The latter was no simple task on a Saturday afternoon, and Rin was quite proud to successfully claim a window-side table for them. Makoto smiled at him when he finally returned, and set down the tray. "Oh wait, napkins. I'll be right back."

"Sit down. I'll go get them."

"No, it's okay. You go ahead and start. I'll be back in a second."

And Makoto was gone before Rin could reply. When Makoto returned, Rin gave him a withering look. "You know, I'm not a girl. It's okay to let me get things myself."

"Oh. Um." Makoto gave an embarrassed chuckle. "It's not that. I guess I'm just used to doing it for Haru when we're out together. Sorry. I didn't mean to, er..."

"Make me feel emasculated?" Rin offered dryly. "Don't sweat it. Just..." So this was not a case of Makoto with a girlfriend, but a case of Makoto with Haru. "...You don't need to, with me." The next part was a little harder to get out, and Rin unconsciously took in a quick breath. "I'm not Haru."

"Oh, but—" Makoto stopped, then visibly reconsidered what he was going to say. Then, with a sheepish smile, Makoto leaned back in his seat. "Okay. I'll remember."

"Where do you want to go after lunch?" Yeah, that wasn't a blatant change of topic or anything. Rin pressed a knuckle on his forehead. Why was it his thoughts sounded sarcastic even inside his own head? He was beginning to annoy himself.

"...I thought maybe you'd like to pick?" Makoto's easy smile wasn't quite at ease as usual. "I picked before, after all."

"Did you always go along with whatever your date wanted before?"

"There's nothing wrong with wanting to accommodate the other person." There was an edge underlying Makoto's tone that made Rin wonder if he'd stepped on a landmine. "I mean, when I don't have a particular preference and I don't mind either way. And Rin, it's been years since we hung out properly and I don't know what you enjoy these days. I'd like to find out what you like."

That was a fair point. Actually, even before, Rin had been a transfer student and so much of their free time together had been at the pool back then. He didn't know what grown-up Makoto (or Haru, for that matter) enjoyed, either. "I like listening to music," Rin offered. "Look, I want to find out what you like, too. It's not like I've had time to develop that many hobbies outside swimming."

Makoto gave him a rueful smile. "Good point. We could visit a music store later, maybe? As for me, it's not exactly something I do often, but..."

"Spit it out, then."

Makoto's smile turned mischievous. Somewhere in the back of Rin's brain an alarm went off.

Belatedly, Rin wondered if he should have asked before committing.

* * *

"You just wanted to see me trip over my own feet," Rin accused as they exited the arcade.

"You said you like listening to music."

"DDR music is _not music_."

Makoto grinned at him, unrepentant. "And I could never get Haru to do that with me. He told me it's lame the last time I mentioned it. Sometimes I like it, though." Then, his expression turned sweeter, gentler. "Thanks, Rin. I had fun."

"Yeah, yeah." Rin thrust his hands in his pockets, then blinked to feel something stiff and slippery. He pulled out his hands, remembering he'd put the carefully cut strip of sticker pictures in his pocket before. Makoto had already put one on his cell phone. Rin's refusal to do the same prompted a sad drooping look of disappointment, and Rin had compromised by putting it on his wallet. Seriously, spending time with Makoto was hazardous to his mental health. Maybe that was why Haru turned out so weird? The stray thought made Rin snicker softly.

"Would you like pick our next stop?" Makoto asked, and Rin shrugged, trying to think of a place that didn't involve pool or swimming or aquatic sport of any sort but wouldn't bore either one out of their minds.

"Rin," Makoto said, and Rin raised his eyes to look at him. "Don't feel like you have to choose the right place? I told you I used to go along with what my girlfriend wanted, but that wasn't only because I was trying to accommodate her. The point is that we spend time together and enjoy each other's company. What we actually do isn't as important."

And there was that look again. One that made Rin's heart skip a beat, then redouble its pace.

"No matter where we go, it'll be fun," Makoto promised, lips curving just a little bit in a hint of a smile. "Because we're together."

Actually, Makoto alone should probably come with a warning label period. Rin had to look away for a moment, to try and regain some resemblance of coherence. "Okay," Rin said when he was sure his voice would come out steady. But something snagged his attention, like a caught thread. When Makoto talked about his ex-girlfriend, he'd sounded a bit...tense, Rin decided tentatively, when the issue of being accommodating came up. Haru might not want to know, and maybe Rin didn't really want details. But still.

"Was that an issue with your girlfriend?"

Well. That was specific. But Makoto seemed to understand him with the same uncanny instinct he had for Haru. "You mean, being too accommodating?" Rin nodded. Makoto shrugged, but it was clear this wasn't a topic he was entirely comfortable with. "Yes."

The whole supportive thing was never Rin's forte. But they were dating, sort of, and he should at least make an effort. There was no harm in asking if Makoto was willing to talk about it.

"D'you wanna to talk about it?"

Makoto looked a little bit startled, then considering.

"We don't have to," Rin hastily reassured him. "I mean. I know Haru said he doesn't want to hear about it. But I don't mind. Hearing about it."

Oh God, his brain had turned to mush. It was probably the aftereffect of Makoto and the kittens. Definitely a warning label warranted. Warning: toxic level of cuteness may permanently impair your brain functions.

Before Rin could continue his mental flailing, however, Makoto smiled at him. "If you're sure you won't mind."

"I don't," Rin said, perhaps a little more emphatic than necessary, but given the state of his mind, he thought he was doing commendably well.

"She said she could never be sure what I wanted. That I was too accommodating." A self-conscious laugh. "I think that was the girls' code word for boring. I'm not exactly the most exciting person to be around."

_Were you hurt?_ The words were on the tip of his tongue, but Rin held them back. If the answer was yes, he wasn't sure what he'd have done. In either case, Rin knew Makoto would deny it. "Did you like her?" was what escaped him instead. Rin could have banged his head against a wall if there had been one handy nearby. Foot, meet mouth.

Makoto looked...not exactly taken aback, but more like he didn't expect that question. After mulling over the question for a few minutes, Makoto answered slowly. "I thought I did. I wanted it to work out." Makoto's lips took on a slight downturn. "I wanted her to be happy."

There was a sick, twisting sensation in his gut that Rin couldn't name. Haru, he could have accepted. And Makoto had always had a big heart and cared about everyone and their kittens. But the thought of Makoto actually liking someone that way, someone outside them, was... He couldn't put his feelings to words. Like he could hate a person for existing, even when he didn't even know her. Unpleasant. Sickening.

"If she wasn't, she didn't deserve you." He tried to keep his voice light, but it came out flat, almost hostile.

Fortunately, Makoto didn't seem offended. "It wasn't a matter of deserving, really. I just came to a conclusion. That if we weren't happy together, maybe we weren't supposed to be together, you know? I never have to be – something I'm not with Haru because he knows me. He understands it when I go along with him, it's because I want to, not because I'm hiding myself or – or –"

"...I'm going to regret asking," Rin said slowly, "but did you happen to talk about Haru when you were with her?"

"Um. Yeah. I mean. It slipped out a few times. Haru's always been my best friend."

Makoto hadn't denied it when Rin asked if he broke up with his girlfriend because of Haru. Rin had been teasing, mostly, but hadn't thought he might have hit upon the truth, albeit in an entirely different way than he'd thought. Count on Nanase Haruka to sabotage someone's relationship while not even being there. Or aware of it. "And she didn't like that, I'm guessing."

"No. She—"

After a moment of silence, Rin leaned closer to Makoto, bumping shoulders. "Look. You can tell me. I'm not Haru and I'm not going to tell anyone if you want."

Makoto gave him an affectionate glance. "I know." A second later, Makoto continued. "She said I spent more time with Haru than I ever did with her. On the day we broke up, she – we were both upset and said some things. But I thought about them later and she might have been right."

"What did she say?"

"That it wasn't natural to think more about a friend than about a girlfriend. And that I went along with her because I didn't care."

The second part wasn't true, and if the said ex-girlfriend knew Makoto at all, she should have known that. Rin allowed himself another surge of uncharitable thoughts toward the unknown ex, with a side of vindication she wasn't in the picture anymore. "And you thought she was right, about you and Haru?"

"Maybe? I know friends and girlfriends are different. But with her, I was never sure what she expected from me. Like I could never just be myself. And that became exhausting. I never felt that way with Haru." Then, with a shy smile, Makoto offered, "Or with you."

Rin could feel the heat spreading on his neck. Makoto darted furtive glances around them, then before Rin could ask what was going on, leaned closer and kissed Rin lightly on the lips.

"You're blushing," Makoto informed him, voice warm and pleased.

"Am not," Rin countered automatically. He could feel his face turn warmer now that Makoto chose to bring it up. Damn. "Trick of the lights."

Makoto tactfully didn't pursue, though the amused smile said he wasn't buying Rin's excuse. "Thanks for listening, Rin."

"Welcome," Rin said, a bit gruff.

Rin would never know exactly what set Makoto off. The next moment, Makoto's fingers were curling around the back of his neck tenderly, almost _protectively_. Then Makoto kissed him.

It was hardly the first time Makoto kissed him. But Makoto hadn't kissed him quite like this before, like he was trying to weave reassurance and affection with every breath. The protectiveness of Makoto's touch, instead of making him irritated, made him embarrassingly happy. Rin was abruptly reminded of the time Haru kissed Makoto in the pool, all but wrapped around Makoto who held him up so lovingly. He was not Haru, and couldn't ever bring himself to do that. Haru was pretty straightforward about some things, but more importantly, Haru never had a reason to feel insecure where Makoto was concerned. Never had a reason to wonder if he'd be unwelcome, or if Makoto didn't prefer someone else's company.

Rin didn't grudge them their bond. Never had. But it was hard not to feel excluded, sometimes. Added to the problem was the undeniable fact he'd been away for four years. Hadn't kept in touch with them through no one else's fault but his own, which would be why he couldn't even figure out where to go next with Makoto.

"Rin," Makoto whispered, and drew back just enough to smile at him. "I'm so glad to have you back."

Only Tachibana Makoto was able to render him speechless like this. Rin swallowed dryly, and had to clear his throat before he could speak again. "I'm glad to be back, too." He really didn't want to bring this up now, but he hadn't actually apologized for the first time they met after he returned to Japan. Makoto would probably tell him it wasn't necessary. But then again, Makoto would say a _lot_ of things weren't necessary with him, and Rin didn't want that. Didn't ever want Makoto to receive less than what he gave.

"And I'm sorry about the time we ran into each other. That night at the old club," Rin specified. "I shouldn't have ignored you and Nagisa. And. All the times after."

Makoto blinked, like he was surprised Rin bothered. "Oh, that's okay. I understand."

"And for not contacting you. I—"

"Really," Makoto interrupted, gently as only he knew how. "I do understand, Rin." Then, he added, "Haru didn't tell me about the time he ran into you back in junior high, either. I'm not expecting you and Haru to tell me everything." Wry humor quirked Makoto's lips. "Just the important things. And yes, if you cut off contact this time, I _will_ be mad."

"I won't," Rin promised before thinking twice about the potential train-wreck in the making that was their current relationship. When he realized, clearly Makoto had realized the same, because Makoto's grin grew too wide to be quite innocent.

"I'll hold you to that. No matter what, you promised."

Rin had walked right into that one. Seriously. Being in Makoto's vicinity impaired all his higher brain functions. "Fine," he capitulated, resigned.

Makoto beamed at him. "Great! So, where do you want to go next?"

Somewhere Makoto wasn't going to have a chance to be so cute. Rin didn't think he could take any more of that today. They did the DDR already, so maybe they could go for a session at the karaoke next? Rin was secretly rather proud of his singing voice and liked visiting karaoke. Not that he was trying to impress Makoto or anything. It was just a good, relaxing place to go on a date.

Decision made, Rin smirked at him. "Tell you what. My turn to surprise you this time."

Makoto looked intrigued. "Okay. Lead on."

* * *

_**Note:** _Their karaoke session may or may not have been much like Chapter 2 of **Ad_Astra**'s fic, **_Denial is Not Just a River In Egypt_** (on AO3). Drinking game: take a sip every time a Denial reference is made in this chapter. :D

No smut yet, sorry. No, not even off-screen. But yes, Makoto DID give Rin a chaste and loving kiss before they parted. Well. Maybe not THAT chaste.

Next up: Rin's date with Haru! And other stuff. Leading to the smut...er, good stuff. Unfortunately next update will take some time. Sorry. :/

Last but not least, before I forget again: inspiration for the Free! threesome is credited to the delicious fics by **caffeinekitty **(AO3). Particularly about Makoto kissing Rin, because I likely unconsciously borrowed from **caffeinekitty**'s _**Language Arts**_. Probably also **_Action!_ **and _**Relaxation Technique**_.


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